Buried Feelings.

11. Alyssa

Jason dropped me off at Jessica's place about an hour ago. We were currently in her room getting ready for the fair. It started at half 6, but of course we didn't want to be too early. I sat at Jessica's make up desk and started to apply my make up when Jessica came out of the bathroom dressed in a peach non sleeve dress that flowed out a little by the waist. It stopped just above her knees. She slipped her feet into her favourite pink thin heeled shoes. She added a floral bracelet and a hand held pink purse with a bow attached to the front of it. Her hair in tight curls framing her face. She looked hot as always.

"Looking good Jess" I smile at her through the mirror applying my eye liner.

"You look tots hot too Als" She comments. I was wearing a grey and white striped dress that came to above my knees with a brown belt tying at my waist. I slipped my feet into my brown sandal looking wedges heels with my circle dream catcher ear rings and a double turned necklace. I decided to add my brown leather bag to complete my look. My hair I braided to one side.

"Thanks Jess" I finished applying my makeup when Jessica came and sat down beside me to do her makeup.

"So how was lunch with Scottie yesterday?"

"I'm here aren't I... How do you think it was?" I reply sarcastically gliding my lips gloss across my lips and smacking them together.

"So the guy kissed you... What's wrong with that?" She questions applying thick eye liner to her eyes making them stand out more "If I remember correctly you guys made out at the club the other week"

"Oh that was different I was drunk. I kiss anyone when I'm drunk" I defend getting up and sitting on her bed across the room "He has a girlfriend anyway so I don't know why he thought It'd be a good idea to kiss me"

"Ahh that's why you freaked out" Jessica turns to look at me eyeing me carefully before going back to do her makeup "And then went and got the comfort from Jason"

"You make me sound horrible" I mutter crossing my arms.

"I'm just saying Als" Jessica shrugs "I think this thing with you and Jason is breaking your walls down. I think your starting to like him"

"Well it's not and I'm not... Jason is just... He helps me forget"

"And Scottie doesn't?"

"He knew my dad and his brother has a piece of my dad inside him so no he doesn't... Jason doesn't know and he doesn't treat me differently. Everyone else looks at me like they pity me. You and Jason are the only ones that don't" I state getting frustrated with this conversation "He kissed me and he shouldn't have. Now can we stop talking about this"

"Okay" Was her only response as she finished up her makeup.

xxx

Jessica and I link arms as we climb out of her car and head towards the front gates of the fair. The guy behind the counter asked for the entry fee which we paid for only costing £5.50 because we were students. We head for the stands first playing a few games here or there then walking around and stopping out of the way from the others. Jessica hadn't found any guy to go off with yet so I hadn't been looking for Jason.

"Isn't that Jason?" Jessica squints her eyes to get a better view "Yeah Als that is Jason" I scanned the crowd following where she was pointing and she was right... Jason was there. And it seemed he wasn't looking for me either. Annoyance came to me as soon as I saw the blond bitch hanging off his arm.  Wait... Oh god that can't be jealousy can it.

'Am I jealous?' my inner thoughts swam around my body and I just stood there looking at him flirting with that girl. This was unbelievable... Here I was second guessing this whole thing between Jason and I thinking maybe Jessica was right, maybe I was starting to like him and now I think I know I do like him. If I'm getting jealous that must mean something right... Crap I need to forget about it. I need to forget my feelings. I need the barrier around that part of me not to crumble around me. I need to try harder to keep my feelings behind the barrier.