𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐁𝐈𝐃𝐃𝐄𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 (𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒)

~7 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓-𝐖𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆💜

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𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐛𝐮𝐭
𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐩 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐀𝐩𝐩, 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬.
𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐝, 𝐝𝐦
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Dedicated to
Toyosi
I don't have your username.
But, you know yourself😂
I love you.
🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

🇴 🇳 🇴 🇲 🇪 '🇸  🇵 🇴 🇻 

                 °𝐎𝐍𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐋•

Phones were contrabands at school, I took it anyway. I recently got an obsession with a blog called "THE EYES"

I was sure it was run by our classmates, up until now, I hadn't been able to figure them out.

Why was I so sure, it wasn't a singular?

I found that blog fascinating, I wondered how someone or a group of persons could have sole power over people's thoughts.

Deep down I knew the only reason I was always on my phone, following "THE EYES" back to back was because I was so scared of seeing my story on that blog. My life was pretty interesting for the blogs, trust me. I had tons of secrets, I never wanted out.

My hands started trembling. It was the withdrawal symptoms again. I hated this feeling. It was exhausting. Whenever my doctor changed my medications.

I lost hope in getting better already. Nothing was happening. Those pills weren't doing me any good. I was abusing it, I knew that. But couldn't control it. The normal dosage wasn't working for me.

I had run out of my other pills. I wanted to stop. The guy supplying to me had started taking advantage and billing me. My upkeep money wasn't helping again.

I don't blame him.

I knew he was billing me. The price he was selling to me, wasn't the actual price.

I felt a drop of sweat from my forehead. I had to remind myself the aircon was on. Suddenly I started feeling some sense of impending doom.

Was I having a panic attack again?

Not again

These few days, it had been difficult. I hadn't told my parents about it. I didn't want them worried about me again.

It was going to stop, I assured myself.

Deep down I wasn't ready for my medications to get changed again. I was still dealing with the withdrawal symptom of the other.

I was asked to report if I felt funny, even though my appointment wasn't till a week time.

I had been battling with Anxiety for long as I could remember. I was diagnosed with GAD a few years back, and Panic Disorder a few months back.

It wasn't easy for me, and still isn't. I feel like I am going crazy. I am a mental patient for fuck sake.

It's been draining for me. Sometimes I feel like I can't cope again.