Acosmist || {Moonknight}

VII. Quiet.

Sleepless nights for Lucilla were quite common. However, Ptah would openly discuss random topics about Egyptian deities and their stories with her for hours on end.

Last night he didn't say a word. For once Lucilla's mind was silent, no sign of Ptah to be heard. There was no sigh, no feeling of being watch. Just peace. Some would say peace was relaxing but it wasn't for Lucilla.

She could never tell Ptah's emotions because of the fact that he had hidden them from her so well. Telling if the god was angry or upset in a situation was only done through the tone of his voice as he spoke. Either way Lucilla was usually left out of the blue.

"Well done." Was the last Ptah spoke the night before. It was obvious that Lucilla angered Ptah by what she said to Marc but she'd never expect him to be this upset with the girl.

"What did I do wrong?" Lucilla questioned. She prayed that Ptah was still beside her, just watching like he always was. She hoped he was close enough the hear the question and even give a possibility of giving Lucilla an answer. It didn't matter either way. She knew what made him upset.

The god was nowhere to be found as Lucilla scanned behind her in the mirror. "Ptah." She moved to pull her hair into a ponytail as she spoke. No response came. The room remained quiet and Lucilla still couldn't figure out what was going through Ptah's mind.

If Ptah was going to give her the silent treatment then Lucilla saw no need in remaining as an avatar. Ptah obviously sees her as an unfit avatar so why carry on?

Lucilla stared at herself in the mirror for a mirror before muttering a small "Release me." It was certain that Ptah could hear her and now she's made her request, it's their choice on what action to take next.

There wasn't a moment that went past that night where Lucilla didn't debate asking Ptah to do that very thing, and now she has it didn't feel as though anything's changed. She looked just as tired as she had when she first awoke and she felt the exact same. Well, Lucilla wasn't exactly sure how everything worked. She's never been in a situation like this before.

Without Ptah was a way of life Lucilla hadn't come to grips with. What would she do now? The last thing she wanted to do was pack everything up again and maybe move north. Everything was circling back to Lucilla so why not run? It's what Marc did.

But she didn't know what she wanted. So many things have come crashing down on Lucilla in the past 24 hours to the point that it is hard to choose what to deal with first. With Ptah at least she had someone to coach her through everything.

Besides, she'd be leaving everything behind. It seemed like a good idea on paper but now... maybe not. The idea of being alone again scared Lucilla. She needed someone to stop her from falling down into that pit again. Prah was that someone.

"Ptah." Lucilla called out on a whim but gained no response. Perhaps they was still listening, hoping and waiting for Lucilla to ask them to come back.

Her eyes drifted down to her watch as wind blew through her window. 09:32 it read. Steven's shift at the museum must be starting soon.

Seeing Steven wasn't on top of Lucilla's priority list but she did make a promise to Mark. If she didn't go after last night's events then she'd be at Marc's level, someone who's never in one place to avoid the truth. Steven had no right to be treated like that, he was innocent. That's the least Lucilla could do to the sweeter version of Marc.

Even the walk to the museum was silent. Painfully silent to the point Lucilla had to put her headphones in and listen to music just to fill the silence. She couldn't remember the last time she had to do that. It must've been long enough for her to forget how much she hated the sound of her own mind. The silence couldn't remain for long, and if it did her mind would always jump to worse-case scenarios. Why? Lucilla had no clue but maybe that's why she liked Ptah's presence.