𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 𝐈-𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃

Ｃｈａｐｔｅｒ22: DREAM

Leesu's POV

"Oh, God... stay away from me if you're just telling that". I slapped my forehead from getting headache from Heeseung.

"You don't believe me?". He raised his eyebrows.

"I chose not to. I don't have time for that, you know that. I don't want to make any barriers between all of us". I replied.

"I'm telling you because I want you to be aware. Some of them might taking advantage without you knowing. I know that we already comfortable with each other but it takes time to trust a person, especially new people". Heeseung still pushing it.

"But you're making it awkward for me. I know that no matter what happens, my brain will not stop thinking what you just say everytime I'm with any of them". I just want to have a peaceful moments here.

"Okay... I'm sorry. I won't bring that up again". He apologized, I closed mouth smile back.

"I didn't think that one. I know you've been in that situation, I'm really sorry". He said again. I throw him another pillow in response.

I don't want to sound air-y but Heeseung knows what I've been through in middle school or even after I graduated and join in the show, some men already confessed their feelings and some even the people I thought was a friend. Like I've said last time, Heeseung knows everything about me. I don't have a friends that I can really called as best friends because I never have one even in London.

I don't like feeling that way, I want to live peacefully without those feelings because at the end of the day I still won't choose my heart over my dream if that disaster happens. I'm not a big fan of that kind of story.

As much as possible, I'll stop it, I'll stop them. I will distance myself if it's necessary.

"But why do I feel like I'm just wasting my time here?". I randomly asked and looked at Heeseung.

"Huh? What are you saying?". He furrowed his forehead.

"I don't know. I feel like that". I chuckled nervously.

"Why did you think of that?". I just shrugged my shoulder as an answer.

"I know I'm crazy... but I can't stop thinking like that". I leaned back on the wall.

"I won't let that happen. We will debut together, we've been together for a long time and I can't imagine not having you in the team. It just like someone took my sister away". I closed my eyes tight.

"We're here now, we've been waiting to debut. All of our friends are now debuting, we made a promise, right?". I nodded at him. A tear scroll down.

"But, what if we didn't get in the line up for debut? what will happen to us now?". I gulped before I continue.

"I don't think I can move on again. Too many heartbreaks that is not come from love but heartbreaks from dreaming, it hurts more". Tear followed by tears and tears again.

"Is it bad that I'm dreaming too big? for someone like me to dream that big? Is my dad right?...". That's when I broke down.

"There's nothing wrong with dreaming big, what wrong is not following your dream because of the people around you". Heeseung offered tissue and stay away a little.

I don't like having physical contact or hugging me when it comes to talking about my family because I know once they touch me to comfort, I will just cry more and I hate crying. I really really hate crying.

"I want to call Mom and Aunt...". I sniffles, I'm slowly calming down.

I know it's impossible since phones are not allowed.