Deviant

My dolphin

Flashback

Y/N pov

The first thing I did as soon as I entered my bedroom was to lock the door behind me and throw away those fucking sandals I was forced to wear. Then I switched on the lamp placed beside the bed and let myself fall onto the bed with a sigh of relief. I stared at the ceiling above my head as I recalled what happened less than an hour ago.

His mother was completely different from what I'd expected.

My head snapped to the right and I smiled as I watched Jungkook lying on the same sheets, fast asleep on my bed, completely clueless about the fact that I just come back from a meeting with his mother. His chest moved up and down slowly, his breathing even. I guess he fell asleep while waiting for me. I didn't mention anything to him before I left. I just took advantage of the fact that he wasn't around and fled. I had no idea that it will take me so long and that I will get back so late.

There was a sadness tugging at my heart as I looked at his cute face. I felt bad for keeping this away from him. He was struggling so much to heal himself and everything to work better between us. These last few days he accompanied Dr. Mingyu to visit his patients. We didn't discuss it but Mingyu kept me updated. And I was so proud. With time Jungkook became more open and started to initiate small talks with them. Some even ended up liking Jungkook and asked for a second meeting. It made my heart melt.

I was sure that I wasn't very good at pretending that everything was alright. I was sure he could see through me and be aware of my uneasiness. Even so, he respected my space and didn't ask about it. For now, the meeting with his mother, I wanted to keep it to myself. The way he looked while he talked about her made me cautious.

Turning onto my side, I moved my head so my cheek was on the same pillow as him. My eyes moved from his closed eyes to his mouth and my smile fell slowly when eyeing his lips. Like having a mind of their own, my fingers were already caressing his cheek softly. I moved my hand up and brushed back strands of hair smoothing it from his forehead as I lovingly watched him.

"My love..." I hoarsely whispered and pressed my lips upon his head, my lips lingering there for a few moments before leaning my head on top of his.

I hope you know that I want what is best for you. That what I'm doing is for your own good.

I want to see you smile.

I want to erase that sadness inside your heart and see you smile freely.

How can I make them disappear? That deep sorrow and agony which are there each time you are looking at me and say 'I love you.'

How can I conquer fear in your mind and your heart?

How can I release you?

I can't. Not alone.

But maybe with your mother's help...

Maybe. Just maybe...

Back then I was literally shaking. Before my first meeting with her.

My heart thumped rapidly in my chest.

I tried to steady my breathing and my heartbeats. No use. All I could think back then was that I will fucking meet his mother. Fucking shit. And that I will lose my shit. I'll definitely lose my shit and kill the lady. It was all I could think of at that very moment.

Wait... Lady?

I rolled my eyes. Since when did I become Jungkook?

I was standing in front of a rustic medieval restaurant, in a dress, climbed on a pair of high heels. Exactly what I needed. It seems that I was born for this. Again... Please, I'm begging you to note my sarcasm.