What's In It For Me? | Xiao x Reader

It's Okay To Cry

It's been three days since Xiao left. Verr Goldet said that he hasn't been to Wangshu Inn since then, but I feel like that's a blatant lie. When I ask her, she gets nervous and brushes it off, quickly takes care of the bandages wrapped around my head, and scurries off.

Oh, and I ate that cake. It's my favorite kind, too. I wonder why it was, because I never told anyone. Maybe it was fate. But I have to laugh.

If my life has already decided its fate and it just goes the way it's supposed to, then why, why can't Xiao come back? I realized we're both in the wrong and we need to make up before it we're both sucked into this horrible state of mind. I can't let him go back to such a dark place.

I haven't called his name, or really spoke since he left. If he's cooling off, I don't want to trigger him further.

And I'm really itching to go outside and train. I need to find a camp of hilichurls to let out my anger.

Maybe todays the day when I'll finally be able to get out of here. Verr Goldet said my wound needs time to heal, but its been days! Surely it's okay now.

I hop out of bed and get dressed, gather my bag (which was kindly left here by Xiao before our fight), and grab the remaining dishes to bring to Smiley Yanxiao.

As soon as I exit the room, Verr Goldet spots me and gasps. "Y/n, get back in there! You're-"

"I'm fine, Verr. I feel a lot better now, thank you." I smile, ripping off the bandage and tossing it in a nearby garbage.

"You sure?" She asks, making her way over to me to take the dishes. I let her since she seems like she really wants to help.

"Yes, I'm all good. I'm gonna go, though. Here," I take mora out of my bag and hand her it. "Thank you for your hospitality."

Verr hesitantly takes the mora, and with a concerned smile, she nods. "Of course. Take care, Y/n."

"You too." I grin before turning away.

"Y/n..."

I turn around to look Verr in the eyes. She sighs quietly before continuing.

"He has been here a few times. He never ate, just sat on top of the roof. He noticed me when I saw him, but I could tell he wanted me not to say a word so I didn't. But now I am. Sorry if I had you worry. I just didn't want to break any silent promises made between him and I," Verr says, placing the dishes on the counter near us. "But he hasn't been here in over thirty hours. I guess when he noticed me, he didn't want to come back. He's out there and feeling bad about what he did, I know it."

I smile sheepishly. "I see. Well, I'm ready if he wants to apologize. I want to apologize, too, so if he comes back, tell him that. And tell him I'm continuing with my journey."

"Of course." Verr grins.

I wave her goodbye before quickly making my way into the kitchen to thank Smiley Yanxiao. After that, I make my way downstairs.

Though Xiao's words still hurt and still linger in my head, I must continue on and brush him out of my mind for now. I'm tired of people being rude to me. I could only handle Yenay's rudeness for so long, and after meeting Xiao I thought everything was fine, but he gets mad a lot, too.

I see where their anger is coming from, their spicy attitude and arrogance. I understand both Yenay and Xiao, but I can only handle one at a time.

That's why I will not go back home. Instead, I'm going to continue my exploring and training. And if Xiao does come back, I'll welcome him back with open arms. I like his company.