Call Me Blade✔

Sixteen: The Storm

Melissa's good behavior has lasted all week. She takes Faith while I go to school, cleans the house and makes home cooked meals for us. Despite her smiles and kindness, I still feel on edge every time I walk out the door without Faith.

Something bad will happen. I just know it.

As usual, I'm a bundle of anxiety all day. I can't allow myself to feel relaxed when there's a possibility Melissa will relapse. She's an addict who hasn't gone through rehab. She'll only last so long.

"Are you okay?"

The question catches me off guard and I snap out of my overthinking, meeting Dustin's brown eyes that are filled with concern.

I nod, unable to explain the emotional turmoil I'm in.

He tilts his head, looking unconvinced. "I don't believe you."

I sigh, slouching in my chair. I'm exhausted but in a different way than usual. Everything is out of whack.

"Want to get ice cream later?" Dustin asks.

I shake my head which causes him to look down in disappointment. Guild bubbles within me, and I get the urge to take back my answer, but I can't rest easy until I know that Faith is okay. She has been fine all week, but today might be different.

I can't risk it.

I pull out my notebook and jot down 'Maybe tomorrow?' which makes Dustin perk up when he reads it.

He gives me a smile and I return it even though I'm far from content. The boy has been nothing but nice to me and he doesn't deserve my attitude. I'm not too worried about his feelings though. There are always bigger concerns on my mind.

Like I've done all week, I'm practically running home when the final buzzer sounds. My usual mantra echoing in my head to remind myself Faith will be okay.

When I open the door, I'm once again pleasantly surprised to see Faith and Melissa happily playing together.

Melissa greets me and I give her a wave, still not used to this. If this becomes my new normal, it'll take a long time for it to feel real.

"Can you get started on dinner? This little one wants all my attention."

I nod, feeling a pang of annoyance, but do what I'm told. I usually get to hold Faith's right as I get home, but today she wants all her attention. I'm surprised that the kitchen has been stocked with groceries. The cabinets and fridge filled with more food than I've seen in a long time.

Where Melissa gets the money to keep everything floating is a mystery to me. I've never seen her work but we always have some food and she always has her "medicines".

I make rice and chicken. Simple and a honestly boring but since I rarely cook and barely ever have an appetite, my cooking skills are limited to what I managed to learn from my mom before she died. I'm not great at it but with enough salt and a couple other seasonings, my meal can at least be passable.

"Thanks for dinner," Melissa says after finishing up her meal. I nod, giving her a tight smile.

"We should watch a movie," Melissa suggests from the living room floor. She's playing with Faith who laughs whenever Melissa presses the stuffed lion to her face.

Okay. I sign to her. I gesture to the kitchen to let her know I'll finish cleaning up before joining.

"Alright." She responds, seemimg to catch my drift. "Any preference for a movie?"

I shrug. I don't care what we watch.

Melissa decided on Home Alone which amuses me because Christmas season is well past over. I am sitting on the couch with her, Faith snuggling in Melissa's lap. I've barely spent time with Faith this week and seeing her with Melissa all the time is frustrating me.

The movie is good. Funny. Homey. Family. All the things it's supposed to be. I enjoyed it but I'm not a big movie person. I'm not big on anything actually. I don't really care for any type of media.

Melissa bids me goodnight, taking Faith up to her room.

Sighing, I clean up some more before heading to my room. I have a harder time than usual falling asleep since for the past week I've been sleeping without Faith in the same room as me.

After much tossing and turning, I eventually drift off into the realm of sleep and nightmares.

Crying wakes me up. I'm disoriented since I was in a deep sleep so it takes me a couple seconds to find my phone and turn on the screen.

12:40.

I've barely been asleep for two hours.

"Shut up!" I hear Melissa yell from her room, the phrase comes out slurred.

I jump out of bed, worry gripping me as I rush to Melissa's room. The storm is here. I rapidly knock on the door, preparing myself for what I've been waiting for all week.

Deep breaths. I tell myself

The door opens, and Melissa looks at me annoyed. She holds a bottle in her hand, taking a swig while giving me an unimpressed look.

I hear crying again and behind Melissa, I see Faith. On the floor.

Panic siezes me and I harshly push past the drunken woman, rushing over to the crying baby. I immediately hug Faith, inspecting her body for any signs of injury.

Panic soon turns to anger as I hold the crying baby.

How long has she been on the floor?

I relax only slightly when I realize she has no injuries. I plant sloppy kiss on Faith's face which quiets her loud crying but she's still upset. I rock her gently, holding her tightly.

"What the fuck is your problem!" Melissa shouts angrily as I walk towards her room door. "I know how to take care of my baby."

I send a harsh glare at her, feeling overwhelmingly angry.

You left her on the floor crying! I wanted to scream in her face. Instead, I push past her as I make my way out of her room. I don't get too far before I'm harshly yanked back by my hair. "You think you know how to take care of my baby better than me?" Melissa seethes, her alcohol smelling breath fanning my face. She grabs Faith harshly, making her scream.

Against my better judgment, I swat Melissa's hand making her release Faith as surprise crosses her face.

"You fucking bitch!" She spits out. "She's my fucking baby! I can take care of her."

She throws the glass bottle at the wall, the loud shattering sound making Faith scream. She slaps me, my face swinging to the side from the impact.

Melissa breathes heavily, staring at me with hate in her eyes. "Fine. Since you think you can take better care of her." She shoves me harshly out of her room, and I almost lose my balance. Melissa slams the door the door in my face and the loud bang echoes through the house.

When I close my room door behind me, I rest my head on it, sighing in relief.

That could have been so much worse.

A few kisses and silly faces later, Faith is no longer crying. She's actually smiling, seeming to have forgotten the horror show from moments ago. The sight of bruise on her arm fills me with worry and I quickly google how to soothe it.

I decide ice for now until I can get a topical ointment for her.

Faith sleeps in bed with me tonight. Since my bed is pushed against the wall, I put her down on the wall side, and surround her with stuffed animals and pillows as security before laying down beside her. I gently rub Faith's belly, and coos happily as her big brown eyes flutter closed

I plant another kiss on her forehead before resting my head on my pillow. I've missed you, sweet baby.

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