Never letting you go (Penelope x reader)

The one at the bar

Penelope pov

I can't stop thinking about how you divide the rooms and that's when it clicks. Who come i didn't see it earlier, i turn towards you to ask about it but you're not there. Instead you come out of the bathroom fully dressed again.

"Where are you going?" i asked with a hushed tone as Jack is asleep in the other bed.

"I'm gonna call Lena and see how it goes, i'll be back soon"

"Okay then can i ask you something?"

"Sure, go ahead" you answer as you look through your bag for something.

"Are Hotch and Em a thing? Like a couple?" you stiffen at my question and that answers it.

"It was the division of rooms, wasn't it?"

"Yupp, if Jack hadn't come with then i would think nothing of it but since he is..."

"Yeah i see it now" you sign as you find what you were looking for. "I promised them that they could have these days as a romantic getaway where they don't have to worry about people finding out"

"But then i came along instead of Lena?"

"Mhm, so you've got to promise to not talk about it to anyone. I know the other's don't think you're good at keeping secrets but please, keep this one. It's the one good thing that's happened to them because of our job"

"I can still talk to you and Emily about it right?"

"Right?"

"Then it won't be a problem, i will be as silent as a mouse" you laugh at my expression and i swear i'm getting butterflies.

"Good, i'll see you later" you say before exiting the room and my brain is going through everything that could have told me about Hotch and Emily. Their seats at the plane, that one time she fell asleep against his shoulder, how they always drive together when Emily isn't driving with Y/n. Holy smokes, how did i miss this? It's like it's written with a neon sign.

Y/n pov

"Vodka Tonic please" i say to the bartender as i sit down at the bar. I didn't call Lena to check up, i didn't even send a text. I don't even know what i would say to her. She's practically ignored me for taking Penelope with me as a plus one.

"Drinking alone i see" i hear the all familiar voice of Thea behind me.

"Judging by how you decide to comment on everything i do, one would think you're obsessed" i answer without even turning her way.

"Me, obsessed with you? There is nothing special about you Y/n?"

"But there is about you, cheater"

"What? I'm no cheater" she says shocked and i'm forced to turn and face with my drink in hand. I haven't taken a sip yet.

"I noticed it in the way you stiffened when Tony touched you, how you barely made eye contact with your own husband, and maybe the fact that you're in the bar in the middle of the night" i smile victoriously to myself as her face goes red. "It's funny how profiling works, i can know everything about you without even asking"

"Please don't tell him" she begs and it's actually funny how blackmail works.

"There's a difference between you and me, i don't want to hurt my brother so i won't tell him. No matter how it would hurt your reputation" her face is still in shock. "Now i would suggest that you get back to your husband and leave me alone" and without another word she leaves. So i turn back on the chair and continue to stare at my drink. I know i shouldn't drink it, not that i would have any problem with controlling myself. But people would have a field day knowing i came to an engagement party hungover.

"I must say i'm impressed" another familiar female voice says behind me again so i turn around with a sign. But my bitter expression is quickly changed as i see who it is.

"Lexie, Mark. What are you doing here?" i ask, as i'm confused to how we managed to get the same hotel as two other brothers.

"I could ask you the same question" Mark says and i can see the same question in his eyes.

"Look, i was as surprised as you that he was invited" Leixe says as i get up to give them both a hug.

"Yeah we're not the only one's, i meet Anthony when we checked in and he was more then surprised that i was invited"

"You mean three out of six got the same hotel?"

"Yeah, what are the odds for that" i say with a laugh that doesn't even have anything in it, it's just empty.

"Well, i'm tired from the drive so i'll go check in and i'll meet you up at the room" Lexie tells Mark and kisses his cheek. Turning to me with another hug. "I'll see you to breakfast then"

"Can i join you?" Mark asks after a few seconds of silence, gesturing towards my drink.

"Sure" i say, sitting down and watching him order a gin and tonic.

"So, where's Lena?"

"She's good i think, i haven't really spoken to her" he looks questionly at me, probably because he expected her to be my plus one. "She has a surgery planned tomorrow so she couldn't make it"

"So who's your plus one?"

"Penelope"

"You mean the Penelope that Lena is jealous of because she's close to you, Penleope?"

"Yupp, that's the one. She's up in our room, sleeping. Emily booked a double and a couples so i'm stuck with her boyfriends son and Penelope"

"Emily Prentiss got invited? Who's her boyfriend?"

"Aaron Hotchner, you'll meet them both for breakfast"

"So how come you're down here instead of upstairs"

"Maybe because i'm scared"

"What are you scared about?"

"Because that jealousy Lena has, didn't come up out of nowhere"

"So let me get this straight, you're engaged to one woman but in love with another?"

"No, i'm not IN LOVE with Penelope. I just can't stop thinking about her, how it would feel to kiss her and... oh my god" the realisation hits me like a train.

"There it is. And i don't think alcohol is gonna fix your problems" he takes away my drink and he's right about that.

"But what do i do, i'm marrying her in less than two months"

"Answer me this? Do you love Lena?"

"Yes, of course i do"

"Are you still IN LOVE with Lena?" his question makes me quiet.

"I can't throw thirteen years into the gutter Mark, not after every promise about not leaving her"

"So you're gonna punish yourself to stay with someone you no longer are in love with just because it's the right thing to do?"

"Yes?" i answer hesitantly even though i know how wrong it is. It's just gonna hurt even more on both ends.

"Then i want you to look at Derek" he says and i'm confused.

"Addison cheated, that's the difference, with you i might add"

"Just look at the bigger picture. He had fallen out of love with Addison and fell in love with Meredith. But still later on they tried to stay together but they were miserable because he had fallen out of love with her" and somewhere in it all, it makes sense. God how i hate when he's right.