Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with?
Never easily falling in love with someone you work with while you both are dating someone else. Walking around hopelessly in love with each other, until something happens where...
"I can't keep doing this Lena, nothing is going on between me and Penleope and i'm not the one avoiding me" i almost scream at her but control my tone, turning to her once again.
"I'm not avoiding you, you're the one that's out on cases all the time" she says with a higher voice than me.
"And when i'm home you have shifts at the hospital, shifts that you choose. Making me hang out with Penelope because i don't want to be home alone, you have no idea how that feels"
"You think i don't know how it feels to come home to an empty house, go to sleep in a king size bed all alone, having to do everything alone? I was the one that was all alone for eleven months Y/n"
"You have no right to bring up that case Lena, would you rather that he was free to come to the states? You know he wanted to take children to bring them up in his damn Mafia, you think i could let that happen to my brother's kids? Lucas kids? To the people we love?" i take a deep breath to not get carried too far away from the first topic. "At least i'm not the one using it as an excuse to get my fiance to do what i want"
"You think i'm gonna use the case to force you to do something i want?"
"You know from the moment we started dating that i didn't want to get married, then the case happened and made it look like a promise to forever be together. Do you know how it suffocates me? How relieving it is for me to take of the ring and breathe"
"Then why do you wear it? Why did you even say yes in the first place if it's such an inconvenience?"
"Because i love you, that's why i go through that. Cause i love so much it makes it worth it and maybe i don't want to throw away a whole decade of our lives. So imagine how i feel when i get the blame for us not spending enough time together, when i become the villain for not wanting kids when you know exactly why..." i'm interrupted by the phone ringing so i reach for it but before i answer she says.
"Imagine how it is for me having to adapt to the new you, you died Y/n and never came back. The person i have before me here is not the woman i feel in love with" and even with my conflicting feelings it still feels like she's ripping my heart out and stepping on it.
"Sloan-Goodwin residence, Y/n Sloan speaking" i answer the phone and Lena just looks at me.
"Hi, it's Emma Goodwin" her mother answers camly, unknowingly to the conversation she just cut off. I really don't have the energy for a conversation with her right now.
"Hey, Lena's just here if you want to talk to her" and i can see in Lena's eyes that she knows that it's them on the phone.
"No we wanted to talk to the both of you"
"Really, about what?"
"We just finished the wedding invitations and would like to go over a few things with you two" she has a happy tone in her voice and i have to take a deep breath as i can't do this now.
"I have some paperwork left at the office from my last case that i need to do but Lena can go through it with you two. I want her to have it all her way" i put on a smile to make my voice sound happier.
"Oh okay, good luck with that and we'll see you this weekend. I'll mail you a copy so you can see it later" she says before i pass the phone to Lena. I don't have the energy to have them over this weekend, it's thursday so i have to pray for a long case over the weekend, or just a lot of work.
"I'll see you tonight and we'll talk" i say before she begins to talk to her mother in another room. I take my bag that i still haven't unpacked when my phone gets a message from Aaron about a new case and we have to leave immediately, also a text from Morgan that says he'll pick me up that i answer 'ok' to. So i turn to walk over to Lena in the bedroom to tell her.
"Hey, i have a case so i have to go but i'll call you when we land and i'll have the phone on at all times. The car keys are in my raincoat... i love you" i say and hear her mutter an 'i love you' back as i make my way to the door once again. Lets just hope that this case stretches out over the weekend as well, or at least the paperwork so i can have an excuse for my attitude. Or maybe a few days with Penelope will get my spirits up, but that thought i shake off as Morgan pulls up next to me and we're off to another case.
"Did you know that Savannah and Lena are colleges?" he questions as i sit down but i didn't know that.
"No, i thought that night at the bar a few weeks ago was the first time they meet"
"Apparently it isn't, and they hate each other" i can't help but laugh and he laughs with me.
"Really? Well if my maths' correct they've known each other longer than we have since she started right when we moved here" i look down at my phone and see that i've gotten that mail from her mother. I open it and the level to detail and everything doesn't surprise me. The Goodwin family seems to be good at that.
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"What's that?" Morgan asks as he glances over at my screen.
"My wedding invitation, Lena's mother just finished them"
"They're coming over this weekend right?" he asks and i sign, putting my phone away.
"Yeah and i so hope that this case lasts that long with the paperwork so i'll get to avoid them as much as possible"
"Don't worry, a few hours with Penelope and you'll be back to normal" and i swear that he read my mind earlier. "She's coming with us by the way so she can rub of her good energy on you"
"Good, i'll be needing it" but he doesn't question why i'll be needing it and i like that because i also don't have the energy to explain the fight we just had.
