Uncontrollable Heart Book 2 (Poetry) (Journaling)

You Guys Love Me, Right?

-Journal Entry 1-
'Post-traumatic Stress Disorder episode'
6/23/22
3am

(Trigger Warning)

I'm sorry

I'm so... so so sorry

I didn't... didn't mean t... to

It was a... an acc... accident

I'm so sorry

That I wa... was born, I did... didn't mean to be

I'm so sorry m... my bodies no... not satisfying for you

I'll try harder next time I promise

So please don't hurt me, I... I just need um... need some practice I swear

So sorry my bodies not enough for you, just don't throw me away

I'm so so sorry

I swear I'll... I'll be... I'll be better

I promise I'm... I'm gonna be better for... for sure

I swear I'll listen and do whatever you want

So... so please, I beg... I beg you

Don't hurt me, or... or um throw me away

I'm a good girl, I'll... I'll be a good... I'll be a good girl for sure

I'll... I'll do what... what I'm told, so

Please, I'm sorry so don't hurt me anymore

I swear I learned... I learned my... m... my lesson, I uh swear

I... I'll learn I swe... swear, please

Please let me... me stay, I'll be um good

I don't um really ha... have any... anyone else

Do... don't go, don't lea... leave me

I'm no... not good, but I um I swear I'... I'll satisfy you

I'... I'm getting be... better please

S... so please... please keep m... me

I... I will be... become use... useful so don't leave

So, plea... please let's um try... try again

So, um accept my uh apology for... for be... being so useless

I'll behave, please I... I swear

Don't hur... hurt me I'll be um be good, please

I'm scar... scared, it hurts, how um many times do... do I have to um do it

I won't... I won't ask again I'm... I'm so sorry

I'll satisfy you, so um, um please use me as... as you guys wish

Please just um love me, and uh care about and wa... want me

I'll listen... I um swear I'll... I'll listen, please stay and... and keep loving me

I'll be good, I swear

Please I'll be good... I'll be very good

I'm sorry, so sorry

Don't hurt me, don't... don't throw me... me away please

I.. I um know you don't uh... Um actually believe or.... or accept me

But I um, I uh swear on my... my life that I... I'm not ly... lying

I'll be... be the perfect... toy so please... please don't leave yet

Just, I um just want... want you to um love me li... like the uh others

I'll behave, I promise

I'll only... I won't speak for... for um sure only uh, only listen

I'll be obedient I swear to you

I'll won... won't um do any... anything unless you um want me to

I'll get um permission for... for um everything I promise

So please, plea... please stay I don't wa... wanna be alone anymore

I'm in so mu... much pain but I can... I can handle it

I mean, you... you did promise to um to love me, right???