Uncontrollable Heart Book 2 (Poetry) (Journaling)

You Never Loved Me ya Know!!

(poetry)

Why don't you see what your doing wrong
How can you ever think your doing nothing wrong when I almost died
I mean you guys, your the ones slowly k*lling me
I can't believe I just now noticed, how t*xic and horrible you are
I'm hurting so bad and I'm even d*ing, but you don't care
And sense when did you get to decide whether I deserve happiness or love

I don't know what I did wrong, but I promise to fix whatever it is
Why don't you guys love me for me anymore, your my parents
Of course I lost myself, you've had me change who I am till you were happy
I'm not trying to be a burden, but your the one's who chose to have me
I didn't choose to be born, so stop blaming me already so I can leave
Because it's not my fault, so then I ask again what about my happiness?

I miss how you  treated me like your baby, before I grew up at the age of 6
I wanted a family, but if not from you I'll at least give it to my babies
I mean I'll always love you guys, and that is one thing that'll never change
But your the parents so I'm not responsible for you it's the other way
I'm leaving no matter what, so don't stop me but let me say bye
Cuz you'll never find me again, be better parents or find a new puppet

Because I don't plan on being controlled till the day I d*e
You only see or hear what you want, so no use saying anything anymore
I'm not about to waste the time I have left trying to get through to you
Finally you showed me care and love, only after I got pregnant from r*pe
But sense I lied and said I miscarried, you stopped caring and pretending
So yeah you guys better expect me to be gone the next time you notice me

I mean I'm not gonna stay where I'm not welcomed
I plan on living the rest of my life my way
I've finally let you guys go because I realized I'm a nobody in your eyes
I mean you make it clear that if you can't control me you don't want me
The way you guys think is so messed up, ya know that?
You guys don't care if I live or d*e, cuz I'm just a waste of space to you

I mean you guys just love toying with my emotions like there's no tomorrow
I'm not comfortable nor do I feel safe, so I choose to just run from you
I used to stay always expecting the same, but only got rejected and left
I try to fight the pain, just need a little confidence and courage
I'm unsure, just feelin like I'm d*ing still tryna deal with the stresses
Life is such a mess, so I wish to God I would be blessed

I'm still so far away from where I belong
But I'll find my home because this place is far from it
So let's just let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I just yell and scream but I'm never heard am I?
You say you love me, but the more say it the less you mean it
All the more, why I can't believe you ever again

I'm just replaceable to you aren't I?
I mean you gave birth to me, but it's like once I got older you changed
I was once your baby girl, but now I'm just a problem right?
So now I take back my promise, it's not like you've ever kept your's
I broke nothing, you guys were already messed up
You broke me now, so like I said before you should be happy you

I never did anything wrong, but I only get silenced in the end
I behaved and did what I was told, but never was I seen by you guys
I finally let you guys go and never have I felt so free
I've decided to go my own way, and I'm never looking back
I won't ever make promises to you guys again
I mean you never kept your's, though I'm not a bad influence ya know?
You guys threw me away, so just be ready to find out what you lost
Because I'm not looking back ever again
I've never felt so free so I'm leaving with no regrets