Uncontrollable Heart Book 2 (Poetry) (Journaling)

Are You Really Okay?

The end my life sentence that left my lips
Oh yeah that should be easy to explain though, right?
I mean I'm insane and there sadly is no cure for it, so guess I'm dying
And damn, well guess I'm broken but I'm missing a few pieces, so guess I'm unfixable
And I'm just hurting to much inside but you know there's no numbing cream left
So, guess I'm just bound to bleed out from my heart, the one that's split in two

But you know what, I'm probably just feeling unwell, ya know like the world says!
Yet you know I'm just not being loved like I deserve to be, so I'm just broken-hearted
I mean I guess I'm just getting to much sleep, but we both know I'm sleep deprived
Also as much as I like to pretend I'm fine, those thoughts are always lurking around somewhere
I know I shouldn't be sad but instead happy, but pretending is the best I can do so take it
We all know life's lonely, so don't bother acting like you care when really you don't even notice

I act happy and like I'm all better, but guess my body is to numb to feel my body shutting down
But you know as well as me that were all scared of something, I guess death just doesn't cut it
I've always acted like I didn't care, but I'm so tired of life I'm actually so damn angry at myself
In the end though my families disappointment is what hurts the most, though I guess I'm okay
We all try to plan life out right, but they just seem to backfire and knock us down ya know?
Some believe they still have their dreams but aren't willing to put in the work, so they fail

Life can be so miserable, guess we just weren't ready for the roads we'd have to walk down
You'd wonder why I try when I'm always in a daze, I'm not I'm simply existing in the world
We all know what it's like when weeks go by, were in such a daze we think it's been a few hours
Were trying so hard to feel happy and do better, but when things take to long we give up first
Life can be so hard and demanding that isolation is what we now want, it's like we're gone already
We constantly feel like were missing out on life but thing is, life is still moving forward without us

Were constantly sick, and lies of society are slowly erasing our existence the longer were stuck
We're so committed to suicide like a life-line, but all this judgement is killing everyone slowly
Your so stuck in this cycle of thinking your better when your actually slowly breaking inside
I've lost all hope, and maybe it's a good thing or bad one but we'll never know will we?
I used to be so determined to be a doctor but now I'm determined to die by your hands
If only you could see, if we just keep going this way we'll all meet our end and our maker

I mean no one gives a shit about me so why not try, isn't that what were all thinking?
Why not give it a try, tie that noose around your neck climb to the tallest branch and jump
We all know we wanna try it, maybe a different scenario but the same thing in the end
We all believe were the only one suffering but in the end the whole world is suffering
I mean you think your the only one but your not and you never were so stop with the pity party
So, we all know each other is suffering so instead of a pity party try a party that's about not giving up

To be honest no one will ever come to save you from whatever it is you may be suffering from
So I suggest you get up and try pulling yourself out of that black pit of pity
Don't wait around for your prince charming or savior because you don't have either one
I mean sure someone will come and maybe see you but their dealing with a lot too, ya know?
I mean even if we don't see it yet were all suffering the same, but we still hurt one another
But someone once said that toxic people can just escape through a revolving door
Well I got news, that's true but their just escaping back into their own personal cell in hell
But when one goes back to hell someone who's worse takes their place, so choose to leave and not stay
Even if that toxic person may be someone you know or even yourself