THE TIRED SUNSETS AND THE TIRED PEOPLE-
it takes a lifetime to die and no time at all.
CHARLES BUKOWSKI
When you ask for a loved one to fight when they are on their deathbed you don't fully grasp how much you asking of them, not, not until you are there, experiencing it. When you are facing that kind of absolute exhaustion that came with death, you feel guilty, guilty for asking that of someone you love, praying and begging for them to fight, but they are just so damn tired. The kind of tired you can feel so deep in your bones, it's like a thousand pounds weighing your body down, forcing you to feel it.
When I heard the faint pleas of your husband, I knew, no matter how exhausted or how nice it would be to just rest, for once, I knew he wouldn't make it without me. That might sound self-centered and cocky, but it's true, and I knew my husband better than most. The steady beep coming from my left was about the most annoying thing in the world at the moment, doing nothing but adding to my already splitting headache. Slowly coming to, I noticed that my whole body hurt, and my eyes refused to open, no matter how hard I tried to pry them open, to look at my surroundings, I couldn't. That's when I noticed that I wasn't just sleeping, I was stuck, only allowed to listen to the world around me as my body took the time it needed to heal whatever had caused this to happen, I was in a coma. Fuck, James is going to be so mad.
"Hey Allison, it's uh, it's Sam," The familiar twang that only came from his birthplace, Louisiana, reached my eardrums in a delightful thrum. He sounded nervous and that made me nervous, but what ruffled my paralyzed feathers was when he placed a gentle, hesitant hand in mine. Some shit was going down, where was James? "So, uh, I know you're going to be mad, but unless you decide to wake up and beat someone's ass, your just going to have to deal with it. Shuri said you could hear people, so I'm just going to let you know what's happening. We're all heading to Siberia, or however far all of us can make it without Tony trying to ensue world war three; avengers style. So yeah, if you want to stop them now would be a really good time to do so," Sam hinted, rubbing my arm in a platonic way, it was almost comforting, had I not just been told my husband was going to risk his life again, but this time he would be without me. My heart monitor spoke for me, as my heart rate spiked to concerning levels as an alarm sounded, sending a few new voices into my room.
"Her heart rates up to 200, bp is reading 140 over 90," a feminine voice reached my ears, the strange accent that came with being a Wakandan not present, she's not from here. "Okay, Sam! I need you to calm her down! Someone get Barnes before he leaves! She's trying to die on us again, let's get the paddles ready, I want a crash cart on standby people! Get a move on," the voice ordered, she seemed to be in charge of this wing, although her accent didn't relate her to being a native, strange. I could feel the uncomfortable spasms of my muscles, contracting and releasing, almost as if I was being tazed. I recognized this feeling, this happened a lot at the beginning of my programming with Hydra, I was having a seizure. "She's seizing! Get me, Barnes, NOW," her voice bellowed, she was commanding. I had a feeling that if I was conscious and not dying every few seconds I would like her. A sudden burst through the door startled my already tweaking body, sending me through another round of uncomfortable muscle spasms.
"Baby, Allison," his voice sobbed, he was right there. RIGHT THERE, I wanted to reach out and hold him for the rest of my life, but I couldn't, this was hell. "Dahlia, I'm sorry, please just, please, I'm so, so sorry," the absolute helplessness of my husband's voice as he cried, begging for me, it broke my heart, practically tore it in two right then and there.
"Mmph," I managed to groan, but it sounded more like a squeak of pain as I willed my body to end this torture.
"Oh my God," James exclaimed. "Did you hear that," he asked, probably to the other occupants in the room. He reached for my hand, holding it close to his chest and my whole body felt a wave of relief, he was right there. He was safe. Everything was going to be okay.
YOU ARE READING
A Troubled Mind
Fanfiction"She wore a troubled past like wings- she had been through hell, and though no one could see her demons, they could see the face that conquered them." -ATTICUS In which two souls find each other during trying times, they lean on each other for suppo...
