Painful - A Jacksepticeye x Depressed Reader FanFiction

Chapter 2 - The call

Sean pov.

I was editing my latest sponsorship when my phone screen lit up a lot. I knew that something unusual was going on because normally it was calmer – maybe a message per minute. This time, the messages flooded in in seconds. "(y/ch/n) has just said, you are her favourite YouTuber" "she just reached 1 Million subs" "it would be so fun if you message her during her stream" and so on. I googled her channel. Apparently she was a (y/nat) YouTuber, living in Ireland at the moment. I looked at her Twitter and saw that I already followed her. I had even liked some of her posts before and she had retweeted some of my stuff. I decided to turn on her stream.

I saw her face for the first time. Her profile picture was her channel-mascot, so I did not know what she looked like. Her hair was (y/hc). They covered one eye because she looked down on her phone. She gently pulled them back behind her ear. She was beautiful. "Why do I only find out about you now?", I thought. Someone on Twitter sent me the clip about her saying I was her favourite YouTuber. I blushed a bit. Then I decided to make the first move and write her on Twitter.

(y/n) pov.

"Sorry guys. It took me a while to comprehend what just happened. I feel like I am dreaming right now. Is this real? Did that just really happen?", I asked a bit dramatically to be funny. I wanted to pass it as 'just being a bit dramatic for comedic purpose'. I did not want people to know I am fangirling and freaking out right now. People laughed and asked what had happened. "You won't believe it...Jacksepticeye DM'd me...Yes...THE Jacksepticeye." And as I already expected: everybody was freaking out. "He asked me if I wanted to collab sometimes...Can you believe it? Me in the same video as Jacksepticeye? I can't. But we'll see." I was still freaking out on the inside. I was so nervous. I decided it was a good time to end stream. "Okay guys. That's it. I am really tired and I want to go to bed right now. No video or stream tomorrow. We'll see each other again on Saturday." I let the credits run through and thanked everyone for their time, subs and donations. Then I went offline after raiding some small streamer. I always try to support others by giving them an audience. Then it's their job to catch their heart with their talent. I was still filled up with adrenalin from the DM. I decided to reply. "Hey, I would love to do that."

I flung my phone on my bed and went to brush my teeth. When I returned, I saw that Jack had already replied. "What the fuck is going on?", I asked myself. I still could not wrap my head around the fact that this was really happening. "Great. We'll talk about the details soon. Here's my Discord. Add me." "Okay. Talk to you soon." I closed Twitter and saw some notifications from Whatsapp. After adding Jack on Discord, I decided I could not run from them forever and opened Whatsapp.

Even though I just had a great stream, I got a message from the Jacksepticeye and he even sent me his Discord – I could not shake of the overwhelming feeling of loneliness. My classmates were right – in real life, I had no one. I was sitting in an empty apartment – staring at my computer screen to find some comfort. Trying to tell myself they were all on my side – when after the stream ends, I was all alone. I had 100 million subscribers on YouTube – but not a single friend to go out and celebrate with.

I did not even have to read trough the texts. I was feeling bad enough. But then my eyes caught a few of them. A lot of my classmates were jealous for Jacksepticeye messaging me. "I should have seen it coming", I thought to myself. I should have waited to read the DM until after the stream. I was so mad but at the same time grew so sad and tired from all the bullshit I had to endure every day. Why was I the one being hated? For what? Being messaged? I did not write him! He wrote me! What did I do? I went to the bathroom. I had fallen down the hole again. Not even a day like that could take the pain away. I thought about everything my classmates said during school. I also thought about the messages. "Kill yourself already." "Freak." "Nobody likes you." "Jacksepticeye will soon find out what a freak you are and then he will publicly distance himself from you. Then you can kiss your subscribers goodbye." and many more of their mean stuff ran through my head as I rummaged around.