The Wires Case [ h.s ]

chapter 19

"I can't help how I'm feeling
Scared of my own reasons"

Harry Styles

Ryan is back.

He arrived yesterday, and wanted to meet up today to see how we were doing.

It's been four days since that afternoon, and I spend them laying in bed scared as hell because it finally hit me what we had done and how it could affect to my future.

And to be honest I don't even know how I managed to sleep in it my it after that.

Oh, I think I know. Because it still smells like her. That coconut scent of hers drowns my nostrils every time I lay down and it has become one of my favorite scents.

It's so incredible how I can't seem to get Brooke out of my fucking head, but what's new. And now that I know how she feels, it's going to take a lot more to just think of her as the girl I'm investigating.

But I don't know if I want to.

Everything that happened was so spontaneous. It wasn't planned at all. I didn't even though she would have wanted to have sex. I thought we would make out like we did at Sienna's party and then she would push me away and we would continue to scream at each other.

But we both carved pleasure more than we wanted to admit. And that's what we got.

Nothing more.

Nothing.

...Right?

Fuck I'm confused. I've been over this, and I know I have one thing clear. I like Brooke. I'm attracted to her. But it 's just that?

It needs to be just that. I can't have anything with Brooke, it's not professional at all and I'm literally working. I know I already messed up, and I hate myself for it. But it was a one time thing only, it won't happen again. She doesn't want to anyways.

I'll stick to trying to get the most information out of her I can, and that's it. But how exactly? She literally hates me. Or at least she did, now I think she doesn't like me.

Which is a progress, believe it or not.

Sometimes I hate being this way. Because I never had any kind of attention when I was a kid, so at the first moment someone sparks some kind of interest in me it makes me want to get close to them as much as I can to make them see me. And Brooklyn Wires sure knows how to attract people.

And even though I have my morals, I feel them crushing down every single time her eyes meet mine.

I think for now I'll keep on knowing she has a place in me, but I won't let it win. Because it's not worth it feeling something for someone that doesn't feel the same, or risking losing my job by someone who has been nothing but mean towards me. And if by some miracle she ends up feeling something I don't know what I'll do.

Like I only have two options. Either follow my heart, or my brain.

I've been following my brain since forever, and Brooke might be the only person that will make me follow my heart if things change. And I pray they don't, because it will ruin my life. But I can't deny that if I have the opportunity, I'll be with her.

Because I want to get to know her. I want to make her smile. And I just want comfort. Maybe she shouldn't be the one I should be expecting it from, but it is what my heart wants. It wants Brooke, and I can't do anything about it.

This case is going to ruin my life.

"Harry." Blake's voice takes me out of my head."You okay?" He asks.