Find me

Chapter 70

Alice

And here I am Jake Dawson.
Oh my God, this isn't of Alessandra's. It's his. His personal journal. Should I read further? Is it okay?
Fortunately, I need to know him closely and I think, God helped me. He gave me this so I can solve the missing puzzle by myself. I will have to take this chance for my mother.
I flip to the next page.
15th July 1993
Dear Love,
When I woke up this morning. I heard that someone is crying. And I went closer, my mother was there, wiping off her tears. I don't know the reason but something aches inside me. I asked her why is she crying. At first, she denied to tell me. But later she told me that, she don't have anything left to cook. Neither do we have money to buy anything. And we've already borrowed enough that we can't do it again. My father is a farmer. He hardly earned enough to raise five people. Apart from the fact that he is the keeper of the Amulet. And we are born as Malign. We decided to live like a normal human beings. We don't use our powers unless it will necessary. Sometimes Jacob won't follow this rule. He's sick of being poor. He wants to live like a royal person. Being the keepers we deserve to live in a palace with other Maligns. But that is a living hell. They slaughter people. They make them their slaves. They abuse them for their mistakes. And we don't want to be like them. Monsters. So, here we are living our miserable lives.
Later, I worked all day in a nearby shop. Then I helped some fishermen near the ocean. And at end of the day, I earned enough that we can eat peacefully for two days. And finally, I was being able to bring back my mother's smile.
I don't know him but I feel bad for him and his family. They were going through a lot. And in the end, someone like him has been killed. He lost his life because of us. He deserved to live.
Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with guilt. People like him are no more and monsters like that Malign Queen are still alive.
I jump to the next page.
25 August 1993
Dear Love,
Jacob is being absurd. He wanted to live in the palace. He's being stubborn and childish. He doesn't know the outcomes of this. He never listened to anyone. He said he will leave this scum village as soon as he'll get a chance. I'm afraid, he may end up in trouble. He doesn't know them. He became blind from the glow of the castle.
10 November 1993
Dear love,
Nothing new to tell. Just the old hopeless life. I'm working my ass off so that we can eat and live. Aurora barely smiles in these past few weeks. I know she also wants to live like a princess. But still, she understands everything. She never argued for this.
Mother and Aurora make sweaters and sell them. I must say they are talented. They make sweaters, cardigans and other woollen items for children and old age people. Aurora made a scarf for me for my birthday present. I was so happy when I first saw that. It was a long black one, covering my neck completely. And it was so soft and warm. I loved it.
Luke knocked drag me back into reality. I almost forget where am I.
"Found anything?" He asks while walking toward me.
I nodded. And told him who is the owner of this journal. I told him about Jake's family and almost everything that I read till now.
He scrunched his eyebrows and tilted his head to the side "How did his journal end up here?" He pauses, "Did he live here too?".
Feeling puzzled, I gaped at him in confusion. I didn't reply. Actually, I don't know what to say. Every answer is in this journal. "Let's check it out," I told him as we jump to the next page.
Hours have passed. We completed 40% but didn't get anything useful. We went further.
01 January 1996
Dear Love,
It's the beginning of the new year. And at every new year, we wish that this year will be different. I think my wish has been granted. I saw a girl. I think she's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. Long brown hair, hazel brown eyes. We were in the market. I and Jacob, I set up a decoration shop there. We were arranging the items on the stall when she got off from the shining car, wearing a luxurious dress. Four- five muscled bodyguards covered her in a circle as she wanders in the market. She must be from the royal family. Her milky white skin gleamed under the sunlight, making her the goddess of this planet. I couldn't take off my eyes from her.
Well, for a moment I forget who I was when she visits our stall. She was peering down at every item we had. And when her eyes met mine, I freeze. She was asking something to me but I was unable to say anything. And at that moment, Jacob saved me from getting embarrassed in our first meeting. He answered her. And I was standing there like a fool. I don't know if she noticed or not but I think she did. She beamed at me while leaving, making my heart race.

"Such a playboy" Luke announced while shaking his head.
I roll my eyes, "Come on, there is nothing wrong in liking someone" I pause. "You must have liked someone in your life too".
The moment words left my mouth. I stop, blinking rapidly. Shit. What did I just say? Damnit. But it's too late now to take it back. A bloom of heat stained her neck and ears. I am too embarrassed to see him. But I can feel his eyes on me.
"Yes, I do," he told me.
Heat rushes through my nerves. I know what exactly he means to say. Does he still... Does he still like me?
I quickly start shuffling the pages, trying to avoid him.
15 March 1996
Dear Love,
After two months, I saw her again. I was in the forest to collect some wood. When my eyes dart to her. Armed, she was holding a bow and arrow while riding on a giant panther, approaching in my direction. I have never seen something like this. This isn't a normal animal. But something else. Her eyes blazing under her black hooded cloak. Her arrow aims in my direction, her giant panther running toward me. When she came closer. She shot the arrow, flashing toward me. But it didn't hit me. It passed by my head and strike right through the heart of the deer behind me. I didn't flinch nor did I blink.
I narrow my eyes. She's peering down at me as her lips stretch into a smirk. I don't believe this. She was testing me. She was testing my bravery. She wasn't some ordinary girl. She has a soldier's heart. Then she swings down from his panther. "Impressive" that's her word to me. And before I ask her something else, she walked away. I want to know who she is, what's her name. But unfortunately, I couldn't.
I closed the journal, "Who is she?". He's looking down at me with the same curiosity as mine.
"Must be super rich daddy girl" he commented and shrug his shoulder.
I sigh, wondering who could she be, "Will she fall for him too?".
He leans against the wall, pulling one knee up, "Let's ask him" he told me, gesturing at the journal. He paused,
"Or maybe we just skip some pages and jump to where he is talking about her".
I roll my eyes, "Or you take a rest while I'm finishing this. And when her part comes, I will let you know" I say in sarcasm.
He smirks, "Are you mocking me?". He reaches out to snatch the diary from me. But I hide it behind my back, "Don't you dare" I warn him.
He chuckled. And it's like I'm watching him like this after so long time. His dimple pored into his cheeks when his grin widened. I never noticed before that he have dimples on both of his cheeks. Damn, why is he so handsome?
He move closer to me and take me off guard as his hand shuffled my hair, "You are cute when became an angry bird" he say, still smiling.
And my heart skip a beat as I heard him. Suddenly feeling hot even in this cold weather. I want to know more about him. How will he love someone?
My eyes widened at his closeness. His gaze is at me. It's like our breathing stops.
My lips parted as I'm leaning closer to his face, and so do he. Our lips are just an inch away, his heavy breath falling on my cheek
He swallows when his eyes shifted from my eyes to my lips.
I close my eyes, waiting for him.
Suddenly, I can feel his finger as he curls my hair behind my ear, "You are missing him" he states, sounding dull.
I open my eyes, looking down at him in confusion.
"You are missing Dorian," he says again. He's not looking at me. His eyes are cast down, and his brow is pinched in pain. "You're just out of sorts," he says quietly. "You miss him, and I just happen to be here. It's okay. I get that".
I remain still. His chest moves up and down, and for a moment, I think I'm going to turn tail and run. He's making excuses for me. An easy one to hide behind. It would make sense I'm feeling lost and in need of someone else to escape into. But what's his excuse? I know he looks at me. I know he does it when he thinks I don't see it, but I do.
My eyes sting, filling with tears.
I keep silent.