Helluva boss loo loo land

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Stella: (offscreen) I can't believe you slept with an imp, in OUR FUCKING BED!

Octavia, annoyed at being disturbed, gives a long groan.

Stolas: (offscreen) It was unexpected! I didn't have time to go to a motel!

Stella: (offscreen) A motel?! Like a fucking PLEBEIAN?!

Octavia grabs her phone and puts in earbuds, playing "My World Is Burning Down Around Me" to tune out the screaming as she strides down the halls of the Goetia estate, stepping over the smashed remains of a plant thrown in her path. In the kitchen, Stella continues screaming at Stolas.

Stella: You want to fuck this one, TOO?!

[Stella grabs an imp servant and violently tosses him in Stolas' direction.]

Stolas: No! Of course not!

Stella: You are a goddamn embarrassment! I'm not spending another moment looking at your pathetic, IMP-SUCKING FACE!!

Stella storms out of the room, shouting angrily the entire time, and smashing more potted plants. Stolas sighs in exhausted exasperation before he notices his daughter has entered the kitchen.

Stolas: Good mooorning, Octavia! Did you sleep well, my owlet?

Octavia: Was that a serious question?

Stolas opens the refrigerator to retrieve a massive chunk of zebra meat.

Stolas: Mm-hmm... What's that you're listening to?

Octavia: This song is called "My World is Burning Down Around Me". (beat) It's by Fuck You Dad.

Stolas looks down, thinking the name of the band his daughter mentioned is a hurtful remark.

Octavia: It's a band.

(A/n: totally not hurtful at all)

Stolas: *bemusedly* Ohhhh! How charming...

[Stolas grabs the zebra meat and feeds it to a massive potted plant situated in a small alcove off the kitchen as he pets it. Sated, it falls dormant, closing its three eyes.]

Octavia: So, you two done screaming for the day? *sips her coffee*

Stolas: Umm...

[Stella lets out another scream of anger and another potted plant is heard shattering in the distance.]

Stolas: You know what I haven't done in a long, loooong time? I haven't taken you to your favorite place in all of Hell! Why don't we go to Loo Loo Land?

Octavia: I'm not five anymore.

Stolas: You always were so happy when I took you to Loo Loo Land! What do you say we go there again, have a day, just the two of us?

Octavia: I'd... rather kill myself.

Stolas: I do think Saba is coming

Octavia's demeanor changed from edgy to wide eyed

Octavia: Saba's going?!

Stolas chuckled as he knew that would change her mind

Stolas: There we go! Anything but staying in this house. Now, I'll arrange our security.

Stolas picks up a phone carried on a platter by his now bruised and battered servant.

Octavia: Security for a theme park?

Stolas: We are rich, and we're hot. People want our money and our bodies!

Octavia grabs a box of cereal on the table and begins shoveling handfuls into her mouth.

If I was in hazbin hotel/helluva boss Where stories live. Discover now