Snk Various x Reader | Lemon

Chapter 51: Breaking Point

When we got to my house, I ran the bath in my washroom. Armin stripped and sat beside the tub quietly. Being bare and all made him so cold. Goosebumps covered his skin, hairs standing on their ends. He just wanted to go to bed. He didn't care about dinner. I turned off the bath and Armin got in. I stripped off your clothes and followed him in. He leaned over and rest his head on my shoulder saying, "I don't feel good." I asked him why and he told me, "I don't know. I just feel depressed and tired."

"Well, if you ever need to talk about your feelings you can come to me. I'm always here for you and you know that."

"Alright, thanks. Maybe later. I don't know if I feel like talking about anything right now. I just want to sleep," he mumbled. I told him that was alright, wrapping an arm around him, and kissing his cheek. "I'm glad it's over. I don't like seeing you so distraught Armin," I whispered. He hummed, closing his eyes. 

"I just wanna stay here forever," Armin stated. I sat down at the end of the bath and he sat on my lap. The density of the water made him feel light. He leaned back onto my chest and nuzzled his head in beside mine. I kissed the side of his mouth, cuddling up close to him. I wrapped arms around his waist, my wrists scratched against his grown-out pubic hair. 

After cleaning ourselves off, we got out of the bath. Armin decided to air dry because he was too lazy to use a towel and he rejected my offer to do it for him. He followed me down to my room and lay down on my bed. He sprawled out like a starfish. "My life's a disaster. I'm starting to think I was just a mistake," he grumbled. I lay down beside him and traced my finger around his stomach. "You know, you mean the world to me and a lot of other people. This is just another low in your life. We all have them. Things will get better for you," I comforted. 

"Not for me, my life's terrible. You're the only good thing I have left in my life, and I wouldn't be surprised if you left me too, especially after today."

I held onto him tightly, reminding him, "Armin I'll always be here no matter what. I love you so much. Please don't beat yourself down. It hurts me to see you sad." He closed his eyes to try to hide the tears forming at his waterline. "I'm sorry, I just don't feel happy right now. I'm not in a good state of mind and I haven't been for a long time now," he whimpered. I replied, "I know, and I'm sorry. You wouldn't have gone through all this if I didn't come to your time. It's my fault so I should at least try to fix it." Armin asked if we could stay at my house for the night, and I said we could. 

Armin decided he'd rather sleep than eat, so I let him go to bed. I got up and lay the covers over his body. He stayed quiet, just breathing, lips slightly parted. I kissed his warm forehead before going through my closet. I got out some sweat pants and a tank top, and I put them on. "Be back soon. Love you," I whispered as I closed the door. I wanted to go get some food from the kitchen, I was starving. 

Armin didn't respond, as his mind was already too clouded to think straight. Armin wondered if he'd done something to upset Eren, something other than being with me. Eren would have done something so heinous over something like that, would he? He had to have done something else to piss him off, but he couldn't think of anything. It sucked, he felt terrible. Armin felt like he'd been a terrible friend to Eren. He felt like he'd screwed everything up. He hated himself. Why did he always mess everything up for everyone? Armin even contemplated suicide. Nobody would care, he thought. Sadly enough, he didn't even think that I'd miss him. 

I quickly made some toast and scoffed it down. Ten quick minutes later, I went back to my room. The door was closed. I pressed my ear to the door and listened to a faint crying sound. Armin, inside, muffled his crying in one of my pillows. I opened the door quietly and went over to sit beside him. I rubbed his back.

"Y-Y/N, I don't know what to do," he sobbed. He was so conflicted. Could he fix things with Eren, even after today? I kissed a bony spot on his back. "Do whatever you think will make you feel better," I told him. He sat up and looked at me. His eyes were duller than before and he looked a bit paler. With a sniffle, he started wiping away his tears. "Armin you don't have to do that for me," I said, "cry if you want. I'm not here to stop you, I'm here to help you through it." Armin fell onto my shoulder and starting bawling again. I could feel his tears trickling down my bare shoulders. He begged me to help him, although I didn't know how to. I hugged him, running my hands up and down his back.

"I don't know how much longer I can't hold myself together. I'm starting to feel like I don't wanna be here anymore."

I held onto him tight, not letting go.

"You don't need to hold yourself together. Everyone breaks at one point or another. Getting through those parts of life are what make us stronger, they shape out who we are."

"As if I'm not already weak enough as it is. If everyone sees me like this, or if word gets out about what happened today, I'll be a laughing stock. I don't think I can handle any more humiliation."

I didn't know how to respond, there wasn't really one correct answer and I was afraid to give him bad advice. The conversation ended there. Armin eventually got tired and fell asleep on my shoulder. I lay him down and pulled the covers over us. "Goodnight," I whispered before drifting off into complete unconsciousness.