Don't Say You Love Me

Chapter FORTY SEVEN

Cohen

Two days later, I'm back in Rex's hospital room again.

   After I knew he was going to be okay, I went back to Avila with Luke and spent a day in my house. While all of this was going on over the past five days, my mom had a real estate agent go through and take some pictures and I have already gotten a text saying the house is listed for sale. It breaks my heart, but I've been dealing with enough other shit this week that the house is the least of my concerns. Suddenly my house feels too empty and too clean and, well, barely mine anymore. But certain parts of the house still remind me of Teegan. My bedroom, specifically. And that damn tiny kitchen table that we sat at, drinking coffee.  I have to come to terms with this, though. I will be moving back to San Diego soon.

   It's Friday and I'm supposed to be at the Rental Hut. That situation is too weird for me, so I asked Luke to cover for me, again. I can't talk to Reese, my boss. I don't want to see her face and know that she knows that I hurt her daughter. I told her I wouldn't. So I'm at the hospital again, and for the first time in days, Rex's family isn't here.

   "Dude, I've been so bored today," he starts, as soon as I slide open the door and step into his room.

   I shake my head. "Bored? Really?"

   "Yes. What took you so long?" he asks, but I know he's teasing me.

   "I had to track down Isaac for a ride here," I tell him anyway. "Luke's working for me."

   "I was kidding. Thanks for coming, though. My parents had to work today. Work, while I'm still stuck here." Rex looks around the room. "Can you believe that?"

   I laugh and roll my eyes. I'm glad he is still his usually goofy self. "You're stuck here because you had surgery less than a week ago and just woke up from a coma two days ago," I remind him.

   He shrugs. "Right."

   "Rex..." I begin again, hoping he'll hear my serious tone. He looks at me, waiting. "I'm so sorry that I wasn't with you that night."

   Rex narrows his eyes and then shakes his head. His hair is getting long and looks shaggy as it flops over his forehead. "No. You don't do that. This isn't your fault, even a little bit."

   "But if I had gone to that party with you-"

   "No. You have no idea what would have happened, Co," Rex interrupts.

   "Maybe I'd be here in the hospital instead of you," I tell him.

   "What good would that do?"

   "Rex, you have a whole life ahead of you. You're supposed to be going to college in a few days-" My stomach drops because I haven't thought too much about this until now.

   "I'm still going. Just delayed a little," he tells me seriously.

   "Yeah, but... it should have been me."

   "Cut it out. This was an accident, and it happened to me, but I'm okay. See? I'm fine." He lifts his arms in the air and drops them again.

   "I'm so glad you're okay. Honestly," I tell him, because I mean it more than I have meant anything in awhile. "I'm going back to San Diego. Soon."

   "Yeah? What about Teegan?" he asks, as casually as ever.

   I shake my head, not sure I can even talk about her right now. But Rex is staring at me, waiting for an answer.