Take Your Time (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 17

A/N Thank you so much for being patient with me as I got this out, I hope it's worth the wait! 

"Go left."

Declan kept his eyes locked on the telly, listening to Ryan and having his avatar switch guns as he followed after him.

"So how long have you been off it mate?" Ryan furrowed his eyebrows as he watched the screen and let his fingers move along the buttons of his controller.

"About a month," Declan breathed out, relaxing ever so slightly with Rosie leaning forward to wrap her arms around him.

The green eyed girl was more than grateful her boyfriend decided to sit on the floor in front of her. It allowed her to hold him, to engulf him even as he played his video game. There was nothing more Rosie wanted than for him to be comfortable. And she hoped each kiss she pressed to his neck or every time her hand rubbed circles into his chest he was able to breathe a little easier.

"And do you feel better or worse?"

The younger lad was quiet for a second as he bit his lip, giving his attention to the game, "worse," he muttered, "today was... A horrible reminder of the old days."

Rosie's face fell, "was it just the throwing up or...?" she leaned forward enough to see him.

Declan shrugged but at the same time shook his head, clearly conflicted, "I could never have those thoughts again," he said quietly, craning his neck to look at his girlfriend, "but I just-..." his eyes went back to the screen, "I'm fucking a lot of things up right now."

"Dec don't say that, you aren't," Rosie said softly.

"Buddy cover the right side I'll go ahead on the left," Ryan said, his gaze locked on the game, "and really Dec, she's right. One bad grade and having anxiety aren't fuck ups."

"It's not just that," Declan said quietly as he followed his brother's instructions.

"Then what? Talk it out, that's what we're here for," the older man said.

The blue eyed lad glanced up at Rosie quickly, only to see her eyes already on him. Of course one of the things he felt he was screwing up the most was their relationship. But with how gently she was looking at him his thoughts slowed ever so slightly. That doesn't mean there weren't others swimming around though.

"Just doubts with work and school and stuff," the Irish lad said, leaning his head back and almost immediately Rosie was brushing her fingers through his hair, "I wanna make Cody proud but I feel like I'm not... And school has just been reaffirming that."

"Love of course you're making him proud," Rosie said, not believing he really thought that, "by learning sign and fixing his hearing aids he's proud, let alone what you're doing with his engineers."

Declan swallowed thickly, his mind telling him otherwise. But he looked back up at Rosie, and by her eyes alone he could tell how honest she was being.

He paused the game for a moment, tipping his head and silently asking for a kiss. And it wasn't even half a second before Rosie was pressing their lips together.

"Fuck I wish I had that," Ryan muttered as he glanced at the two, making his brother laugh and pull away, "Cody loves you though mate, and you're still growing. You can't put pressure on yourself to immediately be great at everything you try to do."

"Just feels like I could do more and I'm dragging my feet," Declan shook his head as he unpaused the game.

"You've been saying that since you were 8 and timing yourself on lego sets," Ryan scoffed, his attention going back to the game, "I get it dude, it's the type of person you are. But it's obviously getting amplified. You're always good enough."