The Disney Project

Chapter 12

My crying echoed in the stall, and I felt I was being too loud, but I couldn't stop crying even when I tried. The tears just kept coming, probably from keeping it in for way too long. I don't cry much, ever since my dad died I have felt crying just shows a weak spot. Like and open wound, that everyone can see and just stare at and that's one thing I don't dare expose, my weaknesses or my wounded areas. People just use it against you, I've experienced that before, and I don't ever want to make that mistake again.

I finally got my crying under control, but as I did I felt a different emotion as the sadness and humiliation left. Pure anger is what I felt. I could feel it coursing through my body like fire was put in my bloodstream. I took a deep breath, but it wasn't helping. My anger was more than I could handle, I needed to hurt someone or something right now! I couldn't keep it in, so I punched the locker stall with as much power that I could muster in the moment.

When my hand connected with the stall I felt the worst pain in my life. I screamed so loudly, I had just punched with my broken hand. Typical move for me, if I get extremely mad or upset, it usually ends badly.

I whimpered at the new pain in my hand, but something urged me to feel more of it. So I punched the stall more, I wasn't in control anymore. I was slowly breaking now, I had bottled up all the pain of my fathers death, the betrayals, and Cameron's and Lydia's crap for too long. My emotions took over, and for once I didn't try to push them away. After the tenth punch my hand was numb with pain. I cradled my hand, and fought back anymore tears that urged to come out. Then I heard someone walk into the bathroom, so I held my breath.

"Clarissa, are you in here?" I heard Lexi's voice say, it was no more than a whisper.

"It's fine Lex, I'm fine." I said, but my voice sounded too strained to be natural.

Lexi walked over to the stall slowly, I could tell she knew I was on a very thin thread. She had never seen me cry, so she knew that this was bigger than a little drama. As Lexi got to my stall door she knocked lightly, and I opened the door for her. I needed her support, I needed someone to keep me above the water. She locked the stall door behind her and sat down on the floor by me.

Lexi sighed then asked me the question I didn't want to talk about, "What happened out  there Clary?"

I didn't want to answer her, but my emotions took over again. I told her everything about what Lydia had said to me, and how she humiliated me in front of the whole school. I cried, but it wasn't another break down. Tears streamed down my face, but I made sure I kept a hold on how hard I would cry this time.  Lexi just listened to what had happened, and she started to cry too, I don't know how I could stay alive without her. When I finished the story Lexi just stared at me with tears streaming down her face, and her mouth wide open.

"Oh my gosh, Clary I-I'm so sorry. I wasn't there for you, I should have been there! I am seriously going to kill Lydia, she doesn't deserve all the praise she gets from people, she needs to be put in her place! How can she be so cruel to you? You never did anything to her, you don't deserve this crap Clary!" Lexi ranted, and I couldn't help but smile. She had my back no matter what the issue was, she was a true friend.

"Thanks Lex, you're the best friend I could ever had hoped for. You make me feel loved when I feel hated by the world. You understand my pain, and only seek to make me feel better. You have never betrayed me, so thank you for that." When I got that out it hit me extremely hard that I need Lexi to keep me going, she is my anchor.

Lexi launched herself at me, giving me a hug that I needed desperately. I hugged her back, and I smiled. I wish every moment was like this, warm and embracing, loving.

When we broke the hug Lexi started to talk again, "Want to have some fun Clary?" She had a creepy grin, and I knew that meant she was ready to give Lydia her own medicine.

"Sure, I guess so. What do you have in mind? By that freakish grin I can see that it is kind of diabolical." I replied with a slight smile on my face.

"We need to prank Lydia, let her feel humiliation! She needs to know that the whole world could see her get humiliated. What do you think?"

"I think that is the best idea I have ever heard in my life!" I said happily, it was time to strike at the queen bee of the school. There would be no second thoughts on this, I knew I wanted her to feel humiliation, and this was a life time opportunity!

After that we left, and lets just say my mood had been brought up.

__________________________________________________________________ Heyy how are you lovely people? I know this is short and I haven't updated in more than a week, but school is too much for me at the moment! I'm trying to get to updating more but then I get huge papers, and big exams to study for. I won't ever leave this story though okay? If I ever was going to I would tell you in bout two months, but I'm not so yeah! I'm trying though, just wait until summer!!!! Then I will update a lot then! Did you notice how broken Clarissa is? I tried to show you guys how she felt, and I think it was good. Please comment and vote for this story it really means a lot to me. When people don't it makes me sad, it makes me feel like it isn't that good. but I'm learning to cope. I gotta go so I hope you guys liked this chapter! Luv you all!

XOXO