The Threesome (Harley Quinn X Male Reader X Poison Ivy)

A Fight Worth Fighting For

In the basement, Frank sits in front of the t.v. with Chaz.

Frank: Lotta shit happened this season, people. Lotta shit. So much shit, I'm compelled to recap that shit for you. Also, I tested very well as a character, so the producer would like to shoehorn me into the show whenever possible. Okay. Oh, man. This season's been compellin' as fuck. Lots of twists and turns. Cable ACE Award-winnin' stuff. When we last left off, that tiny rat bastard, Dr. Psycho, had betrayed Harley. Turns out, that tricky fuck was in cahoots with the Riddler. And, with the help of some bullshit technology straight out of a comic book, they now control a army of blood-sucking parademons, courtesy of Darkseid. Dark-side? I don't know how to pronounce that shit. And even worse, he took control of (Y/N), who's now on infinite demon time type shit. So, now, the only way Harley can stop Psycho is with the help of the Justice League. (he munches down on popcorn) But wouldn't you fucking know, they're trapped in the Queen of Fables' storybook. Remember that shit from Season 1? Look at how intricately woven this storytellin' shit is. Peabody Award-level shit here. Further complicating matters is, the only fuck who knows where that book is, is the Joker. (he coughs) But, that dude's a khaki-wearin' amnesiac, who's somehow whiter now than when he was the color of paint primer.  And now, our heroine, Ms. Harley Quinn, has gone against her better judgement, and has dumped the Joker back into acid to jog that fuck's memory, so while future Heather and Evie from the seventh episode, distract (Y/N) from going full on lord of hell, she can find the storybook, free the Justice League, and take down Psycho and his fuck' army. This is some George R.R. Martin, Emmy Award-winnin' shit. Now, get yourself some popcorn, and let's watch.

~Time-Start~

Harley looks down at the chemicals for nothing to happen, as she then walks away a hand emerges. Helping him up, he starts laughing maniacally, only to quickly stop via multiple slaps from Harley.

Harley: (shouting) Where's the fucking book?

~Timeskip~

Now armed with one bat Heather swings at (Y/N) sending him flying towards the ground in a pile of smoke, as it clears he's still unscathed.

Evie: (as she goes to hit him with the other bat, he blocks using his scythe) I told you we shoulda brought our demon weapons!

Heather: (going in to hit him in the abdomen, only to disappear) What? You wanna kill dad?

Evie: (blocking the hit that was meant for Heather) What, no, I mean, if we had them we could've at least exhausted him faster.

Heather: (blocking a hit which sends her slightly back) If dad's mad about you spending time with aunt Aubrey, I can't wait for him to meet aunt Maze.

~Timeskip~

At the hideout, Psycho is laughing maniacally in front of a table with a map of Gotham which has multiple parademon miniatures.

Psycho: Begin the taking of Gotham City!

As he makes every figure converge all over Gotham, the parademons eat and kill anyone in their path.

Riddler: Riddle me this...  Oh. What's the next move?

Psycho: Not a riddle.

Riddler: (gasps) This whole, uh, sidekick thing has made me real rusty with my rids.

Psycho: God! Get me Darkseid.

Riddler: Oh. You want me to get him. Oh. Sorry. My phone doesn't have an inter-dimensional data plan.

Psycho: Good lord! (sarcastically) Some assistant you are. Give me my phone. (as Riddler gives him his phone) Okay, Ds. Deadshot, Deathstroke, Dee Dee, Doctor Aesop, Doctor Death, Doctor Hurt, Doctor Trapp, Doctor Rabinowitz...