Veiled Affection

Chapter Twenty five

Turns out that one time food poisoning wasn't just that one time. And it wasn't food poisoning. For seven days straight I rolled out of bed and ran to the bathroom, carrying my morning sickness with me to the toilet. It all added up; one and one equaled two.

It might be good to mention that Cate wasn't there once I found out. After the second day of my so-called food poisoning she had some work related event she had to attend, so I already hadn't seen her for a couple of days. In those days she called me up in the evenings to tell about her day, and also to ask how I had been doing.

''Are you feeling better dear?'' She asked on the phone, and I lied by telling her that I was. But I knew my persisting morning visits to the bathroom weren't because of the food. It couldn't be. She hadn't had any sickness despite haven eaten the same meal, and my illness still held up after some days.

Seven days in, I decided to finally give in to my worst suspicion and bought a test. That moment of me being by myself in the bathroom, peeing on a stick, still stays engraved in my mind in vivid complexion. Especially the moment after, in which I had to wait for the result to show.

In those five agonizing minutes I calculated my odds, for what it seemed to me, were about fifty-fifty. It could go either which way, and I sincerely hoped - prayed, even - that I would pick up the stick and see only one line.

I thought about that possibility and it seemed very prominent. I hadn't gotten pregnant in all those years that I was with him, and not to forget, he used a condom when we did it. I made sure he did. And what are the odds of a deficiency there? But then I also couldn't rule out the thought of seeing two lines: after a fair share of browsing on the internet and looking up pregnancy symptoms, I found myself guilty of suffering from cramps, tiredness, and not to forget, my upholding nausea.

The timer went off and my heart stopped. I closed my eyes, picked up the stick, took a deep breath, and looked down at the test. I cried once I saw the two stripes. It weren't happy tears.

''No, no, no,'' I stammered. ''Please no,''

I sank to the floor where I stayed, stammering and sobbing, for what must have been ten minutes, before I got up, went and lay in bed, and continued there.

I was in complete disbelief, utterly clueless as to how go on further. A million thoughts raced through my mind, and at the same time, I didn't think at all. I lay there in anguish, crying continuedly, all the while unconsciously stroking a hand over my stomach. I only found out how long I stayed in bed when I got the usual evening phone call from Cate.

I let my phone ring for a while as I tried to control my sobs, before I picked up.

''Hi?'' I said, all the while knowing it was her: I was a complete mess, altogether confused and distracted.

''You have no idea how much I want to hold you and kiss you right now,'' She said all of the sudden, and her forthrightness helped to clear my mind for a bit.

''You would think otherwise if you saw me right now.'' I softly said, my eyes all red and swollen.

''What?''

''Nothing,'' I brushed off. ''How was your day?''

''Downright exhausting,'' She sighed, and continued to tell me about her day. I had the chance to acclimatize as she spoke about all the hands she shook, speeches she gave and camera flashes she had seen.

''I am just glad to go home tomorrow.'' She finished by saying.

''I am glad, too.''

''How was your day?'' She asked.