Veiled Affection

Chapter Twenty seven

I have always upheld my dignity by being honest with Cate, and telling her the truth.

Apart from that one time that I lied by telling her I liked one of her movies, when in reality it got me confused. And the time she cooked dinner for me, and I lied by telling her I loved zucchini, and thus loved her stuffed-zucchini dish. I didn't. Or this one time when she called me to ask if I was free for her to come over. I was, but I lied by telling her I was in the middle of a writing-fever. In reality I was in the middle of reading a jampacked thriller that was unputdownable.

All right, perhaps I have spread a little lie here and there. Of course none of these trivial lies had the capacity to cause any harm whatsoever. However that wasn't the case with my upholding lies I kept telling her at the beginning of my pregnancy. The one regarding my changing beliefs about Gregory.

It started off innocent. I didn't exactly lie... I just didn't tell her everything.

After I told Cate about me announcing my pregnancy to Gregory, and she reacted so unbothered (she fucked me good and well, all right), I thought that that was that. I knew the last of Gregory hadn't come yet, and there was still plenty for me to investigate.

Take his change of attitude for example: completely sympathetic and caring, opposed to the gruff and monotonous attitude of him that I was used to. And the words he so freely spoke out, making me doubt about all that I was certain of before: I didn't want a child, let alone with him, yet hearing all his claims, I doubted that maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all.

What started off as innocent soon became more mischievous. You see there came a time where the first effortless lie was told, and thus began a whole stream of lies.

The first time that I didn't tell Cate the truth came a couple of days after I told Gregory I was pregnant. Cate hadn't been at my house for some time, but then after a few days of mothering, she had the evening to herself and naturally came over to me. In those few days prior I had to myself I did a lot of thinking. I thought about my conversation with Gregory, and not to forget, the fact that I was pregnant.

I would sit on the couch or outside or I was in the middle of writing, and as the sudden realization stuck me that I was pregnant, there were times that I panicked. But there were other times, too, where I noticed a careful smile appear on my face. I didn't know where it came from, considering I never had any maternal instinct in me, but it appeared nonetheless, creating more and more turmoil in my head.

I was glad that after a few days of solitude, distraction came my way. And the fact that Cate came dressed in a full-on emerald colored tailored suit, made it sure that I had distraction enough.

''What do you think?''

She stood on my doorstep, leaning her hand against the doorframe. I looked her up and down.

''To what do I owe the pleasure?''

''I was feeling cute,'' She said and came in. ''And I didn't want you to forget I can look this good.''

I closed the door behind me.

''As if you would need a suit for that,''

She grabbed me by the waist and pulled me closer.

''Should I have come naked?''

''I would have jumped you immediately.''

She smiled.

''Missed my chance there.''

The next moment we were in the living room, and when I sat down on the couch, she plopped herself right next to me, and rested her head on my shoulder. She took a deep sigh.