Allies and Enemies (AoT Reader Insert)

Chapter 25: The Secrets You Share

It can be seen amongst individuals and by observers that one has given up on their comrades when they choose to embark on a solution themselves. It is when one has deemed their companions useless and unable that they choose to stand alone. It is when one stands alone that the world can no longer look upon them with favour and they are seen as a villain.

Eren Jaeger was a man who stood alone. Eren Jaeger, a man who sought to change the world and continued onwards by himself. Eren Jaeger, the boy who had once been Armin's best friend.

Best friends... it was such a childish term. It was rare to hear someone past the age of thirteen refer to someone as their best friend, and it was even rarer for Armin to have used the word in the first place. Everyone had companions, yet it was almost foreign. It was an unknown world - and a brand new concept.

Armin supposed he had plenty of friends. Perhaps more acquaintances than friends, but friends nonetheless. It had become a lot harder to make new friends when seeds of doubt had been placed by his old ones.

In that case, should they even be considered friends? People who only caused more harm than good definitely couldn't be considered good friends, but they were friends at one point. Does retrospec negate the kinship any two people might have shared, or does the title of friend really only matter in the moment?

Eren was still Armin's friend, right? As of this point, Eren hadn't technically done anything too horrible. Breaking out of prison and stealing another nation's weapon wasn't the worst thing someone could do. Besides, Eren must have good intentions. There was nothing else for Armin to tell himself if he wanted to keep believing that Eren was his friend.

"Armin, let's go."

"What?" Armin looked down at the spoon he held in one hand, and the sea shell he held in the other. The blonde wasn't usually a forgetful person, but he couldn't seem to remember what he was previously doing (besides preparing for the search for Eren). Just because Armin considered Eren his friend, that didn't mean that Eren was allowed to break the law. They needed to find him before he did anything too rash - which was entirely possible since it wouldn't be the first time he did something of his own accord.

Armin placed the items he was holding down on a nearby table. "You didn't have to wait for me, Mikasa."

"But I doubt you would have made it on time if I hadn't gotten you." Mikasa quipped in response. "You've been scatterbrained for the past few weeks. Did something happen in Marley? Or is it a Titan Shifter related problem?"

Armin shrugged. There really wasn't much for him to say. There were definitely multiple things that had been affecting him recently, but they were all just little things. Nothing to get too worked up about, right?

"No, I'm fine." Assured Armin. "Let's just get going."

And if 'fine' was feeling an overwhelming mix of worry and paranoia then yes, Armin Arlert was definitely fine. Then again, feeling 'fine' was usually how someone who felt less than fine described how they felt, but didn't want anyone to worry. That was definitely the kind of 'fine' Armin was currently feeling. To be honest, Armin couldn't remember the last time he had felt this uncertain. He had gotten advice from someone a long time ago that usually helped him in times similar to this.

"I don't think there's anything wrong with being scared. Fear and uncertainty are probably the only things consistent in life. As much as we want to believe that we have some control over those things, we don't. At the end of the day, the only thing we can do in response to fear and uncertainty is adapt... and pretend."

Who was it, again, who had told him that?

Or perhaps someone had told Bertholdt that, and he was just recalling it incorrectly.