Love in the Shadows

Chapter Six

(Sam's POV)

Had I ever, in my life felt this fucking nervous?

If so, I couldn't think of a time. My ears were itching, my palms sweaty and I had changed my outfit four times. Four fucking times... I had to berate myself because I wasn't a goddamned preteen girl.

I wasn't sure what it was but something in our texts had felt different in the last day. More flirty, or open? I wasn't exactly sure what it was. But, my heart was pounding with all the possibilities.

I'd offered to pick her up at Lee and Declans and was on my way there now.

I smiled when I saw Tasha's name pop on my dashboard. I had texted her that we were going out tonight and I could just imagine her celebrating.

"Hey, you don't even understand how nervous I am."

Her voice sounded off. "What? Why?"

Immediately my gut dropped. "What's wrong?"

She paused for a second and I realised she was checking our messages when she said, "Shit Sam! That's awesome. I'm sorry I didn't know."

I waved it off and then when she didn't say anything, I remembered she couldn't see me. "Don't worry. What's up?"

"It's not that big of a deal, Tanya and I had a fight. We can talk about it tomorrow."

I wouldn't be able to not worry about it, now that I knew. "I've got like 5 minutes now, why don't you tell me?"

"Ugh. K but I'm making it fast and then you're going to go and have the most amazing first date." The sound of my turn signal filled the car, her silence letting me know how bothered she was, and I patiently waited for her to continue.

"I told her that she should come back to Ottawa with me. Stay with me to finish high school and then figure out where she wants to go from there."

Tanya was just as independent as Tash, she wouldn't take kindly to being told what to do, regardless of the good intentions. "I take it that she didn't like that idea?"

Tasha laughed harshly. "She told me that just because I ran out of here like a scared little girl, didn't mean she was going to."

Jesus.

"That's not fair. You know that's not true, right? Does she not remember what coming out did for you? You were a target. You had to leave for your own safety."

Her voice was quiet. "I know that but I tried to shield her from most of it. We got heated and both said some things we didn't mean... at least I hope she didn't mean them. Sorry. All day it's been eating at me but she hasn't come home yet and I just needed to talk about it."

I looked at the dash. "Is that normal? For her to be out past dinner time?"

Her sigh carried through the bluetooth. "My parents say she probably has practice or something."

Or something... fuck her parents suck balls.

"She said something else, too." She paused before speaking incredibly fast. "Tanya thinks that I emotionally wrecked you and you've never recovered. Her exact words... with an added opinion that I'm a cold heartless bitch."

Ouch.

"Tash, you can't help who you love. You told me as soon as you knew and I chose for us to stay friends. Your friendship always meant more to me than anything else. She's just lashing out, don't let it get to you, K?"

I could hear sobs through the speaker and rubbed one hand over the ache in my chest. Tash didn't cry. "Thank you. I'm sorry to bring down your mood."

"No problem. I have the ability to feel lots of things. Hopefully she gets home soon and you guys can talk it out." I let her think about that for a moment before adding on. "Just think about how you feel when someone orders you around. Maybe start easing into the idea of her leaving. Of her coming with you."