Book 2: The Three of Us

Chapter 19: Something About This Feels Different

I take a seat on the stone rubble of an unknown building, looking at everything around me. In all my years, I'd never seen disaster on this large a scale. A whole village flattened in mere seconds, it didn't seem real. It hurt to see the village like this, it wasn't home but it was the only place I'd been in the last decade with plans to stay. I now had people I cared about tying me to this place, and it made me want to protect it.

Running a finger over one of the gills on my shoulder, I cringe at the dry, flakey skin. All the dust of everything had made its way into my gills, with no time or place to properly clean myself, it had made it become red and irritated. It didn't help that I couldn't stay connected to the Great Spirit without it simply becoming too much. The dramatic disruption of the land was still too fresh. That disconnection has caused my normal abnormally fast healing to slow. I pull my shirt back into place, hiding the ugly sight. The fabric makes it feel worse but I try my best to ignore it.

Tsunade makes her way out of a tent, two ration bars in hand, and makes her way towards me. When she gets near, she throws the bar at me, and I catch it before it hits me in the face. She gives me a look, somewhere between concerned and amused, "You look like a kicked puppy."

"Thanks, I appreciate the compliment," I respond sarcastically but it lacks the usual enjoyment our bickering gives me.

Tsunade sits down on a pile of rubble a few feet in front of me, letting out a heavy sigh filled with exhaustion. We eat our ration bars in silence, they taste terrible but our empty stomachs don't complain. It's been a week since the village was attacked and left in ruin and everyone was growing tired. Naruto was keeping morale up and building was already starting with the help of Yamato. We were all thankful to be alive but that didn't stop the bone deep tiredness we were all feeling.

Itachi has spent most of his time coordinating where and when things are being built, and it feels like forever since I've seen him. It was the same thing with Sakura who was doing her best to keep the hospital running with Shizune. The only time we were together was when we passed out in our bed at my house, all of us too tired to talk most of the time. Despite my exhaustion, my sleep was still being interrupted by nightmares. The last time I felt this exhausted was when I first became a missing nin. And it wasn't just physical exhaustion, it was mental and emotional exhaustion, and all I wanted was a brake from it all.

"I'm not one for emotional shit but you look like hell and if a storm cloud appeared over your head and started raining on you, I wouldn't be surprised," Tsunade leans forward as she speaks, looking me over with the eyes of a medic.

"I've seen a lot in my life but something about this feels different," I admit to her.

She gives a knowing look, "It's war. It does that."

I run my hands down my face - feeling the worsening tremor of my hand in the process - trying to get myself out of this mood, "Geez, this is ridiculous. I'm a mess."

"You've been working your ass off clearing the rubble, of course you look like shit. Of everyone helping to rebuild right now, you guys look the worst. How many bodies have you found?" she asks, her voice becoming quiet.

I let out a defeated sigh, "I don't know. I lost count." The memory of a mangled rotting body comes to mind and I shake my head as if it would make it disappear. Another memory comes to mind and the thought makes me nauseous, "I found a kid, curled up, hugging a stuffed animal. She shouldn't have been there, that district was evacuated. I don't think I'll ever be able to forget that."

"You won't ever forget it. You take that memory and you make it the reason you fight for peace."

I center myself, taking a breath in and letting it out slowly, "Okay," I shake my head again, "So, what's the details about this Five Kage Summit? Is it really happening?"

Tsunade gives a nod, slipping back into her role as Hokage, "Yes, it is. In a weeks time in the Land of Iron."

I shake my head in disbelief, "I never thought I'd see the day."

"You're telling me. Anyways, we're aloud to bring two guards with us. I picked you and Sakura to join me."

My eyebrows raise in surprise, "Really? Me?"

"If shit hits the fan I need a strong ally by my side and someone that can work with Sakura and I's fighting style. Under different circumstances I'd bring Itachi but I need him here running and protecting the village," Tsunade explains.

"I understand your reasoning but I'm not even a Konoha shinobi, and yet I'm going to be one of the people representing the village. Plus I'm still considered a missing nin, am I even allowed to go?" I ask.

"I checked. There's nothing that even mentions it."

"What about Kirigakure? They probably want my head on a spike," I add.

"They can't legally do anything to you in the Land of Iron. It's neutral territory and missing nin have immunity of prosecution from there old villages there," Tsunade explains, gesturing absentmindedly with her left hand.

"On the topic. Who is the current Mizukage?" I ask.

"Some lady who headed the resistance against the old regime named Mei Terumi. Seems like someone I'd like," she says, a look of respect making its way onto her face.

"Huh," the mix of disbelief has me momentarily stunned, "She probably doesn't want my head on a spike but she might really want to punch me."

"You know her?" Tsunade gives me a look of interest.

"We met in the academy, graduated together and were on a team together for a few years. Even when we went into different divisions, we still stayed friends. I'm just surprised she survived the blood line massacre's. Things were unstable when I defected, I had no way of knowing she was okay," I let out a breath of disbelief, a small smile making its way onto my face. It felt amazing to know she was alive.

Tsunade gives a smile to lighten the mood, "Let's just hope you two don't cause an international incident."

I let out a laugh, a list of possibilities of the reunion going through my head, "No promises."