Donte Halstead

Mama Funeral

Donte: 13/Jay: 33

We were now living back with dad.
Today was the day we were all dreading. The day we lay mama to rest. We woke up and dad tried to made breakfast. It was a total fail seeing as mama was the one on breakfast duty.
Dad: sorry kiddos I'll ask Hank to bring over breakfast
Liam: it's fine
Donte: mhm
We all went to get ready and waited for Hank to arrive with breakfast.
After we got ready there was a knock at the door. I went to answer it.
Hank: hey tigger
Donte: hi
I let him in and he set the bag onto the kitchen island
Dad: thanks so much Hank
Hank: No problem
We finished and went to brush our teeth and then dad spoke to Hank while we got our shoes on.
Jays pov
Hank: so is Sam coming?
Jay: yeah James and Steve too
Hank: that's good
Jay: yeah
Hank: how are the boys?
Jay: Liams grieving and Donte well he doesn't know handle the emotions he's feeling so right now he's just handling the only way he knows.
Hank: by shutting people out, getting angry or just simply braking down.
Jay: yep
Hank: damn how are you?
Jay: heartbroken. How am I supposed to do this without her? This isn't how it was supposed to happen. I was supposed to die first.
Hank: I'll always be here for you whatever you need.
Jay: Was I a shit husband?
Hank: of course not. What makes you think that?
Jay: well I didn't see how much she was struggling. If I had just noticed maybe I could have helped her. Maybe then she wouldn't have felt like this was the only option.
Hank: I know but she was very good at pretending everything was okay that it began to look natural. No one noticed. Not me. Anyone at 51 and the district. Med. no one.
Jay: thanks Hank
The boys then said they were ready. We made our way to hanks car and we arrived to the church for the service. When this was done we made our way to the burial.

Donte pov
It was now time for mama to be buried. I'm trying so hard to not process my emotions but I can only do this for so long before I explode. They were lowering mama into the ground. We took in turns to say our goodbyes and lay a flower.
Donte: I'm so sorry mama. I should have helped you better. I miss you so so much. I will make you proud. I wish you were still here.
I then walked away while wiping the tears that escaped my eyes.
Dad: Donte
Donte: hmm
Dad: come here
Donte: nah I'm good I'm just gonna go for a walk.
Dad: okay
I walked for about 10 minutes then saw Uncle Sam
Uncle Sam: Hey bud
Donte: hi
I gave him a hug and a few tears rolled down my face
Uncle Sam: hey kiddo it's okay
Hank then came over.
Hank: hey tigger it's time to go to the wake
Donte: Uncle Sam are you coming?
Uncle Sam: of course kiddo but I'm gonna take a different car
Donte: Can I ride with you Steve and James?
Uncle Sam: I don't see why not. You don't wanna go with your dad?
Donte: I can't right now
Hank: it's okay kid go on then.

At the wake
I went with Uncle Sam and we arrived at Mollys for the wake. I just sat in the corner and I noticed Dad was drinking. This made my anxiety sky high. I knew what could happen and I couldn't handle it again. Liam looked at me and followed my gaze and saw what I was seeing. He then walked over to me.
Liam: Hey Donte it will be okay
Donte: you don't know that tho. The last time he was drunk, he battered me into next week.
Liam: I won't let that happen
Donte: yeah like you didn't let it happen last time.
Liam: Don-
Donte: I'm sorry
Liam walked off frustrated and Kelly noticed so walked over to me.
Kelly: what's up kid?
Donte: nothing
Kelly: what happened with Liam?
Donte: just a little argument
Kelly: about?
Donte: doesn't matter
Kelly: if you wanna talk you know where to find me
Kelly got up and left. I stayed in the corner most of the night. Dad continued to drink. He was beyond drunk and made his way over to me. Kelly, Uncle Sam and Will were ready to intercept.
Dad: it's you. It's all you
Donte: Dad
Dad: you know when I saw her in the hospital I thought how the hell am I supposed to care for this stupid kid on my own.
Uncle Sam: Jay enough
Dad: this hyperactive little bastard who keeps ruining my life
Uncle Will: Jay
Dad: it's all you it's you Donte. You killed your mother you hear me?
Liam: Dad seriously
Dad: you killed her and now your killing me.
He then launched a bottle at my head. I ducked but a few shards caught my face.
Donte: I fucking hate you. I wish you died not mama.
Kelly then took Dad outside and Uncle Will and Uncle Sam followed them.
Gabby: Hey D let me look at your face. Hermann pass the first aid kit.
Gabby then took the shards out and cleaned the cuts. Luckily they weren't deep to the point I'd need stitches. Kelly walked back in.
Kelly: James and Will are taking your dad home so your gonna stay with me
Donte: where's Liam gonna stay?
Liam: I'll stay with uncle Will.
Donte: mhm
Liam: Donte I'm sorry
Donte: it's fine
Liam: Don-
Donte: seriously I'm used to it by now
Kelly: this isn't something you should be used to kiddo
Donte: well it is and I am.