A Merry Muppet Mash-Up

ACT 2: SCENE 7

Camilla is surrounded by joyful snowflake fairies, celebrating her freedom. While Clare, Marie, Walter, and the rest all stare in shock. After the snowflake fairies finish fussing over her, she walks over to Clara and the others and clucks her gratitude to everyone.

Clara: [After finding her voice, whispers in disbelief] "I don't know what's weirder; that the queen of the snowflake fairies is a chicken, or that we can understand every word she's saying."

Marie: [Whispers back] "I know."

Just then the main snowflake crystal lights up and a slightly blurry image of the Stahlbaum's living room appears inside. Within the crystal, Gonzo and company are having a hard time keeping the magic of Christmas alive. Sugar plum fairies keep disappearing, several toys have stopped moving, the Grandfather Clock looks and sounds out of whack, and Swedish Chef has fallen asleep; snoring under the Christmas Tree. Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker are trying their best to help, but aren't having much success.

Marie: [Presses her hands against the crystal and shouts] "Mr. Drosselmeyer!"

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: [After collapsing from exhaustion from dancing a Christmas dance, lifts his head to search for the source of the shout] [Pants] "Hey." [Pant] "Did." [Pant] "Anybody." [Pant] "Hear." [Pant] "Something?"

Clara: [Presses against the crystal while the others gather around her and Marie] "Mr. Drosselmeyer! Are you okay?"

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: [Looks everywhere but drops back down when he sees no one] "Great." [Pant] "Now I'm hearing things."

Marie, Clara, and their group shout at the crystal, trying to get Gonzo's attention, when Camilla and Miss Piggy stick their fingers in their mouths and whistle.

Miss Piggy/Sugar Plum Fairy Queen: [Shouts over everyone] "Stand back everyone! This is a job for us queens!"

Then Miss Piggy and Camilla step up to the crystal as everybody steps back. Miss Piggy and Camilla flap their wings, waving their wands, and flying around the crystal. After about 30 seconds, the scene inside the crystal becomes clear, and then Camilla and Miss Piggy land on opposite ends of the crystal. Camilla clucks and coos at Gonzo as everyone steps up to the crystal.

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: [Jerks up when he hears Camilla] [Looks at her from where he is] "Camilla, my darling, is that you?"

Camilla/Snowflake Fairy Queen: [Clucks "Are you alright, my dear?"]

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: "I've been better. What about you?"

Camilla/Snowflake Fairy Queen: [Clucks what happened to her and her kingdom]

Clara and Marie give Gonzo and Camilla shocked looks as the two talk to each other.

Marie: [Whispers to Clara] "This movie is getting weirder and weirder."

Clara: [Whispers back] "I think we passed weird when the audience saw that our foster parents are bears."

Walter/Nutcracker: [Interrupts Gonzo and Camilla] "Excuse me, Uncle Drosselmeyer."

Clara and Marie: [Interrupts Walter by exclaiming] "Uncle?!"

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: "Yeah. Didn't I tell you?"

Walter/Nutcracker: "No time, no time, what's going on over there?"

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: "Can't you see what's happening? The toys and sugar plum fairies" [Stops as the warped sound of the grandfather clock chimes the sixth chime and the arrow on the magic meter drops to the area next to the grey one] "And the Grandfather Clock are quickly losing their magic!"