A Merry Muppet Mash-Up

ACT 2: SCENE 3

The scene opens with Kermit wandering down a dark tunnel. Unable to see clearly, he trips and falls down a hole.

Kermit/Hoffmann: [Screams while falling] "AHHHH!!"

As he falls a map of the tunnel system appears on the screen, showing the audience which tunnel he falls through while 'Coda' plays at a fast pace. After the music score ends and several twists and turns, he lands in a pool of water. He climbs out of the pool. Panting from the fall, he sighs in relief after he climbs out of the water.

Kermit/Hoffmann: "Let's never do that again." [Examines his surroundings] "Where am I?" [Steps away from the pool and calls out] "Hello?" [His voice echoes five times before scurrying noises are heard. Kermit flinches and gasps] "Who's there?"

Just then many lights light up the area, startling Kermit. He jumps in surprise when the lights move and surround him before covering him completely. Over his objections, they dry him off before moving away from him. Kermit pats himself, checking for any wet spots.

Kermit/Hoffmann: [Looks at the fireflies with gratitude] "Thank you very much, guys." [As the fireflies start to fly away he asks] "Hey, wait a minute." [The fireflies stop] "Do you know how I can get to Toyland from here?"

The fireflies form a line a flutter down a tunnel.

Kermit/Hoffmann: "That way? Alright." [As he's walking, he wonders aloud] "I hope things are going well for everyone. Especially those back at the mansion."

The scene goes to the Stahlbaums' mansion where Gonzo, the toys, the Swedish Chef, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, and Beaker (plus several sugar plum fairies) are trying their best to keep the magic of Christmas alive. As the toys and Beaker are cleaning up the mess left by the battle the Grandfather Clock chimes the third chime of the Midnight Hour. Very warped and off-key.

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: "That doesn't sound good."

As the chime chimes, one of the toys suddenly stops cleaning and instantly freezes back into an inanimate toy while two sugar plum fairies disappear.

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: [As everyone gasps and stares in horror he exclaims] "That's definitely not good!" [Panics with everyone and shouts] "What'll we do? What'll we do?"

Whistling loudly, the Swedish Chef tells everyone to join hands and sing 'We Wish You a Merry Christmas.' The plan works, bringing the toy and the fairies back to life.

Gonzo/Drosselmeyer: [Wipes his brow in relief] "Phew. That was a close one."

Dr. Bunsen Honeydew: "We're not out of the woods yet." [Holds up his Magic Meter where the arrow has moved down from the gold star to the silver star and points at the arrow.] "If the arrow gets down to the grey area, time will resume and all magic, plus Christmas, will cease to exist."

Many of the toys and fairies shudder and gulp.

Random Sugar Plum Fairy: "If the queen were here, she'd tell us to spread more dream dust."

Random Wooden Toy: "Why don't you guys do that now?"

The other fairies smack themselves in their foreheads and do just that. Then the scene goes back to Kermit. He follows the fireflies until he comes to the end of the tunnel.

Kermit/Hoffmann: [To the fireflies] "Thank you again." [Adds as the fireflies leave back down the tunnel] "And merry Christmas!"

While a very somber version of 'Toyland' plays, without lyrics, Kermit climbs out of the tunnel and finds himself in a world of black and white. All the buildings and cottages are bare of any Christmas decor and the windows are all dark. Nobody is out as a breeze blows some paper sheets through the streets.