Brim and Jaylex story.

I have something to tell you. (Jaylex.)🥰

TW: Beating self up, embarrassment.

Jay's POV.
After we had eaten, I started to think about what Alex had said in the car. Could we actually get back together? Was that actually what he was asking? Was he actually asking if I'd love him again? Does he really want me to? I had so many questions... yet no answers! The only person I would get answers from was Alex! But how could I ask him?

I don't know how I'm going to build up the courage to bring it up with him? I really want to ask him weather he still loves me or not, but I'm really scared too! Maybe if I just got closer to him emotionally then he might be willing to or he'll accidentally slip up again?

Alex's POV.
Great! I messed up! Like really messed up! I almost let it slip that I want to get back with Jay! I really hope he doesn't know what the end of that sentence was! I bet he does though! He's really smart with things like that! He was so happy to see me before, but now he's so quiet! I really have fv€ked things up now!

God, this is so embarrassing. He didn't even say anything after! I bet he knows and I've just made him feel awkward! Maybe I should just stay away from him? That way I won't slip up and make things worse! There is no way he'll love me! He hates me, I know he does! Everyone does.

I should have just stayed out of his life after what happened during Marble Hornets! I should have stayed out of everyone's life from the beginning! I'm nothing but a huge fv€k up! That's all I do, mess things up! I can't do anything right! How could I ever love him if I screw up everything? I wouldn't even be able to love him right...

No one's POV.
Alex kept on bringing himself down, thinking he was not good enough, that he would never be good enough. Whilst Jay couldn't stop thinking about how amazing Alex was, how beautiful he found him, how strong he had been these last few years trying to recover.

Jay saw Alex sitting on the couch by himself, looking rather somber and pessimistic. Jay was heartbroken to see Alex like this and sat down next to the melancholy man. Jay rubbed Alex's back, in an attempt to comfort him, as well as get his attention.

Once Alex had noticed this, he turned and looked at Jay, obvious tears building up in Alex's eyes. This worried Jay even more, causing him to want to know what was wrong more then ever.

Jay's POV.
Alex: *Looks at Jay teary eyed.*

Jay: *Worried.* "What's wrong Alex? Please tell me!"

Alex: "I just feel like... I'm screwing everything up! Like everything I do I mess up!"

Jay: "Oh Alex... don't say that...! You don't!"

Alex: "But I do. Name me one thing I've done that's good!"

Jay: "You were willing to get help for your mental health! You let me see you again! Your letting everyone see you again! Your trying to get forgiveness because you feel bad for what you did! Your still alive! We're all still alive! Please listen to me! Please don't beat yourself up about it!"

Alex: "I will always feel like $h!t for it though! I know I've done plenty of good things but... I feel terrible for the negative things I've done! You could've died because of me!"

Jay: "Yes I could have! But I didn't! That's what you should think of instead! The fact I'm still here with you! The fact I've forgiven you! Not the fact you did it!"

Alex: "I guess your right. I still feel bad for it though!"

Jay: "That's normal. It would be more worrying if you didn't feel guilty for it. The fact you feel guilt just proves how much you've changed!"

Alex: "Ok. Thanks. I'll try to think of myself in a different light!"

Jay: "Thank you Alex. Your amazing!"

Alex: "You are amazing too Jay!"

Jay: *Blushes.* "You really think so?"

Alex: *Notices Jay's blush.* "Yeah of course I do!" *Blushes also. Smiles.*

Jay: *Smiles.*

Alex: *Notices both of them are blushing and quietly looks away in embarrassment.*

Jay: *Notices their both blushing and also looks away embarrassed.*

Alex: "I'm sorry. I shouldn't of done that!"

Jay: "No no I-it's fine. It was my fault. I should've tried harder at not doing it."

Alex: "Oh god. I'm g-gonna... go to the bathroom. Y-you do whatever you want!"

Jay: "Ok. Th-that's fine! You do that. I'll j-just stay h-here!"

Alex: *Runs off to the bathroom in embarrassment.*

Jay: *Still sitting on the couch. Hiding his face from the embarrassment.*

Jay's POV.
Oh my, that was so embarrassing. Cute, but embarrassing! I can't believe I just blushed right in Alex's face. I can't believe he blushed right in my face! Could he actually like me still? Does he really still love me? If he does then... he could know that I like him now! That means I may have made things awkward!

Oh no, what do I do if he brings it up again? What do I do if he tells me he likes me? I mean,  I love him but.... I wanted to ask him to be with me, as too not get scared and ruin everything! But if he asks then I might do just that! Let's just try and see if we can ask him out before he does! Besides, I don't think he's as ready to ask me out as I am to ask him out! Meaning, I have more time then I think!

Alex's POV.
No! No! No! No! No! You idiot! Fv€k!n moron! How could you do that! How could you possibly let your guard down like that? HOW?! How dumb do you have to be to blush right in your crushes face? I know he blushed as well but... Wait.... He... blushed.... Too! No no he didn't! Your just imagining it! It's not real! None of this is! Your just dreaming about him again! There is no way he's even here. Your probably just imagining things!

See, look, he's definitely not sat on your...! Oh my god he's sat on your couch! He's actually here! He's in your house! Ok ok umm... what do I do? What do I do? Ok.... Calm down Alex! It can't be that bad! Just... breathe.... Calm yourself!

God I love him so much! I couldn't be more in love with him if I tried! He's so precious, so cute, so adorable... amazing.... It's difficult not to fall for him! I don't think that he could ever love me again but... but maybe he does?.... Maybe that's just wishful thinking on my part...? Maybe we should take him out somewhere sometime? Or just forget about your feelings for him....!

No one's POV.
After Alex had composed himself, he made his way back over to Jay. Alex walked slowly as to not startle Jay, who looked to be in deep thought. Jay snapped out of his thoughts once he noticed Alex approaching. He smiled as he saw him, Alex smiling back. Alex sat back down on the couch next to Jay. Jay wanted to tell Alex about his feelings for him but was afraid to tell him. He soon decided to just go for it and tell him.

Jay's POV.
Jay: "Hey... uhh, Alex! Can I talk to you about something?"

Alex: "Yeah? Sure! What is it?"

Jay: "Well..... ummm.... Sorry this is really hard for me..."

Alex: "It's ok. Take your time."

Jay: "Ok... I wanted to talk to you about....

Alex: "...?"

Jay: *Gets nervous and backs out.* "Umm... oh would you believe it's time for us to go... come on Alex."

Alex: "But you didn't tell me what it was!"

Jay: "I'm sorry. I can't... I'll tell you another time... when I'm more prepared... I'm so sorry!"

Alex: "I mean it's fine but... you've got me intrigued in what it was?"

Jay: "Look I'll tell you later. I thought I was ready but apparently I'm not!"

Alex: "Ok ok. Let's just get all of our stuff in the car and get to Tim's house. We can talk about it when you're ready!"

Jay: "Thank you Alex."

Word count: 1407.