Sold out || A Lando Norris Fanfiction

NINETEEN

After arriving in Berlin yesterday, we ended up just going out for dinner and then booking a well deserved manicure in the hotel spa. Having a self care moment with these three girls turned out to be exactly what I needed.

As any other girls night, we spend it gossiping. Mostly about people one of us knew and the other three had no idea. We also made plans for the days coming up, deciding that tomorrow we'd go shopping. Followed by a day enjoying the enormous swimming pool before having to do the concert on Wednesday.

As I had expected people had figured out we went to Berlin straight away, where I'd hoped it would take a bit longer. Mostly because it is common knowledge that I'd tend to go back to Monaco in between concerts.

With the Canadian Grand Prix coming up this weekend, rumours about Lando and I had been present even more as well. People were showing special interest in us, even more after the incident between him and Pierre during the previous Grand Prix. Some camera had found out it had something to do with me, putting me in the middle of everything that was happening. And while I was of course the one to cause the drama, I was not very fond of the way the media were portraying the whole soap unfolding in front of us.

Even as we are walking through the streets of Berlin, eager to expand each of our wardrobes, journalists found their way to me. We tried to shut ourselves off from the different questions they were asking, yet they stayed very prominent in my mind.

'Can you explain to us what it was Lando and Pierre were fighting about?'

'Do you think Pierre and Lando will be able to not drive each other of the track this weekend?'

'Did Lando cheat on you?'

'Did Lando abuse you?'

'Did you cheat on Lando?'

'Are you and Lando broken up?'

'Are you together with Pierre Gasly?'

Some of the questions that were being thrown at me were horrendous. It was already bad enough that one could make very bothering assumptions through these questions. But I couldn't get over the fact that they were bothering me, while I was clearly trying to enjoy my freedom.

I didn't plan on answering to any of the questions thrown at me. I was very tempted to do so, especially when they suggested I was abused. I had absolutely no idea how that rumour got into the world, and it was really hurtful to me. Lando is such a sweet and loving person, he'd never be able to do that.

When the entrance of our hotel finally appeared in my vision, I let out a sigh of relief. I could finally get away from all the cameras that were focussed on my face. Ellis decided to walk me to my room, as she noticed I was pretty shaken with the sudden swarm of journalists we had just encountered.

I was so relieved to see the bed in my hotel room that I fell down on it immediately. Curling up in a ball, before letting out a sob I hadn't realised I was holding. Ellis placed a hand on my shoulder, drawing little circles with her thumb in an attempt to soothe me. However it had the complete opposite effect, and within know time I was bawling my eyes out.

"It's really not okay what those journalists suggested." Ellis says softly once the worst of my cries have died down.

"Yet they do think it's completely normal to ambush me with them." I say still crying. Trying to push myself up so I can sit against the head board. Pulling my knees up to my chest for comfort.

We sit in silence for a while before Ellis starts talking again. Hesitation in her voice as she begins her sentence. "How much I'd want the journalists to be the only thing bothering you, I tend to think it's more about the subject." The last bit she says quietly, unsure of how I will respond.

I make eye contact with Ellis, aware that I might need to talk through everything right now. "I just don't know how they'd think that Lando is abusing me." I whisper.

"He isn't, is he?" Worry crosses her face, as I mention the question that had only been asked once.

"No," I exclaim quickly, not wanting her to think anything of the sort. "It's just one of the questions they asked, and it really hurt."

"So is that everything?"

"I feel like I've lost him. We haven't had the least bit of contact, and it hurts me. It fucking hurts me. I catch myself looking at my phone even more than before just hoping to see his name on my screen. I even enabled Twitch notifications so I'd know if he'd be streaming. I catch myself going to his Instagram more times than I should, just checking if I'd missed a post or a story."

Ellis shoots me a sympathetic look. "Have you talked to him?"

"I haven't, and I don't think I should right now. He's flying to Canada, judging by his Instagram. He needs to focus on the race." Holding my phone with his Instagram on display out to her. I try to sound confident, but I know very well that she looks right through the facade I'm desperate to keep up.

"Just send him a good flight text, let him show you still care. Do what you'd want to do but try to keep distance if necessary." Ellis suggests, handing me my phone back. I just nod, taking her advise to heart. I know he probably won't answer any time soon, if he'd even answer at all.

'Hey Lan, I just wanted to wish you a safe flight.'
- Aimee

'Also, I wish you a great race weekend. Show them
what you are made of. Good luck!'
- Aimee

I had considered signing the text with an 'x', but decided against it. It went against every fibre in my body, yet felt necessary to be holding my end of the break.

***

On Tuesday Morning, I woke up late. My eyes burning, probably from the amount of crying I did last night. After I had opened up to Ellis a bit, I had gathered myself and we had dinner all together. I would like to say that dinner made the last of my sadness disappear but it didn't. I had kept a fake smile on my face all through dinner. Once I finally returned to my room, I had started crying again. Letting it all out, before I had decided this was the right moment to get everything sorted.

I had been staring at the notepad for a while before writing down everything I needed to. And now on this very Tuesday morning, with my eyes still sore, I had to read it over.

1. I do not have feelings for Pierre, whatever I felt was a spur of the moment thing.

2. I care very deeply for Lando. He's not only caring and sweet to me, he's also very supportive. I should be returning the favour more often.

3. I do not accept the fact that Lando and Pierre had a falling out over me on track. They should've had that sorted out in private, preferably with me there. They shouldn't be risking their lives over this matter, which they did.

4. I am very much in love with Lando, but I don't know if I can keep loving him with all the media attention on us.

Tears were pricking in my eyes as I read my last point. While I really wanted to be with Lando, I did not want millions of cameras on us, it was breaking me in the meantime. I was used to the media attention as a singer, I had had more cameras on me during relationships. But this one was different. This is a relationship that doesn't belong in the spotlights, it's one that's to dear for me.

I sigh, putting the notepad away. Deciding that I'm going to enjoy today for as much as I can, changing into my bathing suit. Before covering it up again and going to find the other girls so we could go and enjoy our time here.