Fool's Gold

Chapter 40

Nick's POV
I had been at home for about a week now. I was still trying to get used to the fact that Grace wasn't with me.

It was a Friday morning and I woke up to my alarm going off. I sluggishly got out of bed and went to the kitchen. I hadn't been eating a lot lately but I seemed to have a bit of an appetite. As I walked in I saw the letters from the other week sitting on the bench. I opened one of the cards out of curiosity as to what it said. It read:

To Dear Grace's family and friends,
I am so sorry for the recent event that has occurred in your life. Grace died because of me and I am deeply sorry. I regret that I was speeding around that corner and I know that I took an innocent life away. Everyday I will have to live with this burden and I don't know how I will deal with it. I am sorry for your loss and I know that you all will miss Grace immensely.
Yours sincerely,
Robert Smith

My jaw quite literally dropped. This man had killed my fiancé, the only person that I could say I truly loved and all he could do was say sorry. I couldn't believe that he had the audacity to send that card. It's ridiculous. Anger boiled deep inside me and I couldn't hold it in anymore. I screamed and rushed to the bathroom where I knew all of my pain could be released in seconds.

Once I arrived to the bathroom I rifled through all of the draws until I found the familiar silver piece of metal. I placed the razor to my wrist and swiped it against my skin. Blood started to pour out in seconds. I repeated the same action again and again and again. Once again I sat in the bathtub and let the blood run around my body. The pain wasn't going quick enough so I cut my once bare skin repeatedly. More blood was coming out now. All of my memories of my life were flashing before my eyes. My first kiss, meeting Grace, going to Hawaii, finding out that Grace was in an accident. Everything was refreshing itself in my mind. I started sobbing when I thought of Grace again. Ever since she had left this world I had gone downhill. My blood was now filling the bathtub. I once thought that this would relieve the ache of my loss of Grace but now it was just a distraction. It distracted me from reality.

I remembered sitting in the bathtub at Hawaii when I last cut myself. It made me think if anyone would interrupt me this time to stop me from cutting. I hoped that they wouldn't.

I wanted to end everything right now. I couldn't see the point in living anymore. There was no meaning in life. Nothing could possibly happen in my future now that Grace was gone. She was my future, my everything. That man killed her that day and I will never be able to get over that. I will never be able to get over the day when I got that call that Grace was in an accident. I was internally screaming through all of the sobs and I couldn't think of anything else to do except end my life. I took the razor with my shaking hands and gently brought it towards my chest. I was hesitant in doing it but soon found the strength. I took the razor away from my chest and then stabbed it into my heart. My head dropped. I couldn't see a thing. Hopefully Grace would understand. I was going to see her soon anyway. I love her and I know that she loved me too.