GANGSTER ROYALTIES: The Gangster Society

CHAPTER 83. SNAP OUT (PART 1)

CHAPTER 83. Snap out (Part 1)

KHALI‘S POV

I‘ve always preferred being alone. I‘ve always managed to be alone anyway. Eversince they left us—me, I slowly started to realize that I was better off... alone.

Being associated with me is danger. Ngayon hindi ko na alam kung tama bang bumalik pa ako para kay Jaemin?

No. I‘m not afraid to be alone. Being alone doesn‘t mean being lonely. So, why did I come back? I realized that I was just... afraid of letting go.

So, I‘ve always preferred being alone in the first place. I shouldn‘t let anyone in my life.

I know, I have those bunch of Anikis on my side. But they‘re my family. They‘re suppose to be with me. Even if someday we‘d have our separate ways, eventually.

But... What about Jaemin? She doesn‘t deserve to be caught up in my mess. Tama pa bang bumalik ako kahit na alam kong may maaaring maidulot akong masama sa kaniya? Just because I needed her.

I should have been stronger. Strong enough to let go...

Pero kung ginawa ko iyon, makikilala ko pa ba si Trevor? Will I still be able to meet this person whom I treasure the most right now? The person whom I can‘t ever let go no matter how hard I try...

How about the others?

I‘m in trouble. I knew the moment I met him, he was trouble. I should have distanced myself from him, after all. Sana nakinig ako sa sarili ko. I should have followed my instincts.

But why does mere thinking about this breaks my heart? Mas mabuti nga bang hindi ko nalang siya nakilala?

Humigpit ang yakap at kapit ko sa kaniya. Binaon ko ang mukha sa kaniyang leeg. No. I can‘t... I don‘t want to let him go.

“Is my baby okay now?” he asked softly.

When everyone called me emotionless... He could tell when I‘m happy. He knew when I‘m sad. He knew when I‘m mad. He knew I what I feel. He cared for my feelings.

He could stir up my emotions just as he could ease me. Naging magaan ang pakiramdam ko pero umiling ako bilang sagot.

He made me weird. I didn‘t like these kinds of things before but whenever he does something, it becomes my favorite thing.

His palm softly brushed against my bare skin, on my bare back. He would stop particularly at my scars and stroke it gently most of the time.

Pakiramdam ko inaalo niya ako sa ganoong paraan. At napakagaan nito sa pakiramdam. Parang nakakalimutan ko ang sakit na naranasan ko sa likod ng mga peklat na iyon.

His gentle stroke... the softness of his touch consoles me. Like it was the best feeling at this moment. Feels like my soul is at ease.

Eversince he found out about those scars, there would always be moments like this. Just silence, while him, consoling me with this simple gesture.

Well, I gave him consent to touch me. I wanted him to touch me like how his eyes tell me how much he wants to do it. But I never thought he could also touch me like this. This isn‘t what I meant but this has become the best and my favorite one. I find it really soothing and sweet.