Love Letters

{11}

~LETTER~

Dear Soulmate,

Today, was the first time I saw Amma so angry with me. She didn't want me to deny Karthik's gift. Karthik is the guy who is interested in me. The one who attempts every opportunity to impress me. He keeps asking about my favorite things and keeps gifting me chocolates, teddies, and flowers yet I force my heart to be amazed and surprised when he does that. I am not happy from within, I feel so cruel when I behave in such a manner.

I wanted to make it clear to him that I wasn't interested in him. I keep forcing my heart to feel concerned for him. I love his attention but I am aware that I don't feel a thing towards him and he deserves to know it.

The connection I had imagined with my soulmate, with you is way different from what I share with him. I know him from the past six months and we meet constantly due to Tina's and Amma's constant urges yet it feels more like a duty. I am doing it to please my mother and my sister. I don't like spending time with him. I keep glancing at my watch, waiting when our meeting would end and I would walk back to my safe haven.

I am sure he isn't my soulmate. I can sacrifice everything but I won't be sacrificing my life. I will wait for you till my last breath. It's my promise even if for it I have to fight with my Amma. I know she will understand because she loves me.

Waiting for you with lots of patience,

Your Shona...