ISSUES 2 II OUTERBANKS S3/S4

sorry

"We're all monsters in someone else's head."

❥

I didn't sleep a lot last night and whatever hour of sleep I got was controlled by the lack of sleep from the past weeks. Instead, I made a new plan. Rafe doesn't need to protect me. It's my time to get him out of here. If I can make Singh believe to let me find the diary and instead I find a similar alternative, he would let us leave. 

Rafe's still asleep so I get out of bed without waking him up and take a cautious look out of the window. We either get free today or Singh is going to kill us. So many risky moments and I could be killed by a strange psycho. My first idea is to knock against the window to make the guard listen to me. 

"I need to talk to Mr. Singh", I whisper-yell at him trying not to wake Rafe up so he wouldn't stop me from following my plan, "Go and bring me Mr. Singh." "What's your plan?", Rafe asks in a raspy voice. It's been some time since I've heard his raspy voice after waking up in the same room. Good old times. "Hey, you. I need to-" 

"Hey, no, Bella. Shut up. What are you doing?", Rafe asks anxiously and jumps us to come closer to me. "I don't owe you an explanation, Rafe", I state trying to hide my actual intention. "Think about it for a second, Bella. What are you doing?", he exclaims confused as I walk over to the door and knock it. 

"Hello? Hey?" "What's your plan?" "It's not your business", I claim and continue knocking the door when Rafe comes closer again giving me a serious look. "Tell me the truth, Bella. What do you know about this damn diary? You know where it is." "No, I've got no idea." "No idea? Okay", he shrugs, "I wouldn't tell me either. I mean we were getting somewhere yesterday but I wouldn't tell me. I'm the bad guy, remember?" 

"Hey, I need to talk to-" "They're not going to believe us when we say that we know nothing about it", Rafe interrupts me again worriedly, "Hey, listen to me. He's killed that guy. Look around, Bella. I'm the only friend that you've got." Which is exactly why I'm doing this, Rafe, I think to myself. It's my turn to help and save him. 

Finally, a guard opens the door and I speak up. "I want to talk to Mr. Singh. It's important." I take a last look at Rafe. I'm doing this for him. If Singh finds out that I'm lying to him, he might kill me but Rafe is going to be free. He would do the same for me. The guard takes me by my arm and escorts me downstairs. 

"Yes?", he sighs heavily. "I've lied. I know where the diary is. I don't have the original book but I can get a copy for you", I say honestly. "You know.. I'm glad that you admit that. Can I offer you some food?" "I'm not hungry." "Calm down. Nothing's going to happen to you as you cooperate. I don't want you to be uncomfortable this way." 

"I just want you to get what you want", I affirm, "If Rafe and I can leave. I know where it is but I can only go there without company.. alone." Mr. Singh chuckles arrogantly. "How can I be sure that you'd come back? You know.. I need assurance." "Rafe's here. That's some assurance." 

"Rafe", he laughs silently, "How can someone who's so young be in such a crappy situation?" "Listen, I know where the diary is", I repeat myself trying to be more convincing as he walks past me, "If you let me go, I promise you that I can get it for you. You've said it yourself. Rafe could be my boyfriend.. He means something to me. That should be some precious assurance." 

"Miss Scott.. I've build all of this all by myself.. out of nothing. I've started with absolutely nothing.. I had less than your father. But how did I do it, huh? At least not because I've let someone fool me. Don't waste my time. The diary is the key to the greatest price in human's history and that's my destiny, Miss Scott. So finally tell me where it is or I'm going to-" 

Singh's voice that has raised with each words stops as it is interrupted by his phone. He takes a look at it and laughs. "A message from our friend Jimmy Portus.. raised by the dead what it seems like. Looks like he caught your friends", he tells me amused and holds his phone in front of me so I can take a look at the picture. 

It shows Sarah and John B who look like they're captured. Singh might gladly let go of me but.. now he's looking for the pogues. "Mr. Singh, please. Don't hurt my friends", I beg him quickly knowing what this message means, "Please, don't hurt them. Please-" I'm interrupted by a guard who pushes me upstairs. 

"It all depends, Miss Scott-" "Please!" I'm being pushed back into the room where Rafe is walking from one side to another nervously. I immediately sit down on the bed and throw my head into my hands. What if they get hurt or even worse.. one of them gets killed? All because of this stupid diary? What if.. 

"What happened?", Rafe interrupts my thoughts, "Sooner or later you might have to talk to me, okay?" "Do I have to remind you of what you've done?", I snap at him without looking back at him. 

I know I'm trying to change the topic so we don't have to talk about my failed plan and it's not fair to him but I just hope that Rafe plays along. "What I've done, Bella.. Peterkin.. I did it all to safe my dad", Rafe defends himself, "I've done what I had to do so.. Just drop it." He walks around the room at first but sits down in the end. 

"The only thing that I regret is pushing you away from me. I'm just a victim as well, don't you think? What's my advantage in Peterkin being dead? Nothing. The only person I've ever loved ran away from me. I didn't have an issue with her.. I mean, I liked her. Do you really think I'm such a monster who decided it for fun? But I admit.. I already told you.. What I've done to Sarah was wrong and I know that, okay? You don't need to remind me of it." 

Tears flow down Rafe's cheek making my heart break a little more. Rafe being angry is one thing but him being sad.. all of the pain that he's bearing. it breaks me to see him like this and that I couldn't do anything to prevent him from becoming this version of him. 

"I shouldn't have done it. I lose control in those moments. I've got no idea why. I don't know what happened. I really try to change, okay? It doesn't matter, actually. What I'm trying to say is.. even if I was this monster, you have no chance. You might not want to trust me but I'm all that you've got left."