ISSUES 2 II OUTERBANKS S3/S4

different directions

"Some doors are being closed, others widely opened." 

❥

"Thank you for being someone we can trust, Bell", Big John says to me like he used to talk to me when I was younger.. like an actual dad. God I miss these times. John B and I watching the fishes while Big John was preparing his treasure hunt and showing us everything afterwards. Half of the week we would go surfing with Pope and JJ. Actually, we used to surf all the time whenever we've not been in school. 

"I'll keep my mouth shut, but remember what you're asking for. I love you like a dad but Sarah's my best friend as well as John B. Just.. please let us help you. Sarah's like me.. nothing like her dad." "I know, Isabella, you're right", Big John nods and throws his head back into his neck. 

For once in a lifetime I see Big John Routledge worriedly. Whenever any of us children was worried, he was there. He never made us doubt our decisions. He's never looked like there was a reason why we should worry. But right now, I see the fear in his eyes, the pain. 

"Whatever happens, we're all here for you", I assure him, "Pogues for life, John." "Pogues for life", John B nods chuckling. He's always found it funny when he heard us say it but he was always proud of us as well. "Do you think I'm a pogue?", I ask Big John thoughtfully to my surprise. Wasn't I so sure about it? Why would I rethink how I feel? Big John laughs. 

"Isabella, you're the pure definition of a pogue. Some of us might be born a pogue and never had a chance. But you're the daughter of the number one kook when I was young. She had to decide between these two worlds, too. Compared to her, you made the right decision." 

"Do you know anything about my mom and Luke Maybank?", I ask interestedly and think back to my first actual and last conversation with JJ's dad, "He mentioned something about her." "God, Luke Maybank. Is he even still alive? Him and your mom have been somewhat like a couple. It was more like her halfway liking him and halfway liking your dad. You should ask her about it.. Well, you know who she decided for. She's living the kook life. You're not." 

"I try to", I nod. "It's been a hard day. Get some rest, Isabella", Big John assures me, "We'll be fine. I promise you that it'll all work out in the end. Don't worry about JJ too long either. You've always been an independant young woman." Big John opens his arm and hugs me warmly as I thank him.

As I arrive at Tanneyhill once again, I see Sarah standing in front of the house in the garden. "Sarah", I greet her as I approach her. Sarah ignores me for a second. I assume that she's having some flashbacks. It's not easy coming back to Tanneyhill after everything's that happened. "It's still your home", I state laying my hand on her shoulder. 

"I wish I could go back there", Sarah nods, "But it doesn't feel like home anymore. Especially with Rafe staying here. But I also want to give John B some time with his dad." "I wish I had a home that I could offer you", I sigh. 

If I hadn't Rafe in some way being close to me, I had no where to go either anymore. I haven't walked over to Christian and Anna yet but I don't feel like being.. well, treated like a kook baby. I'm thankful for everything that they've done for me but this is not the parenting style that I'd want for myself. Plus, they've got enough to discuss with Kiara. 

"I've knocked on the Carrera's door already", Sarah tells me, "They were having a fight and I was told to come back another time. I even went to JJ's but he wasn't home." "Now you're here", I finish her thoughts, "Come in with me. Rafe's not here anyways most of the time and he wouldn't hurt you. Not anymore." 

"I think I'll pass. But thank you, Iz", Sarah gives me a light smile and hugs me before she walks out the garden. I know she wouldn't listen to me if I told her a million times to stay. There's only one person that I take helpful for Sarah right now. 

"Topper Thornton?", Topper accepts my call. "Top." "Bella? From which phone are you calling? I don't recognize the number", he asks confused which is when I remember that I lost my phone during our journey. I never needed a phone with the pogues being around. "Tanneyhill", I answer. 

"Right, you lost your phone", Topper probably nods, "You're at Tanneyhill? I'd expected you to stay with Maybank." "Yeah, well.. JJ and I broke up", I admit but quickly change the topic, "Let's meet up at the club soon, alright? But why I call you in this exact moment is to ask you to take care of Sarah for a whil-" 

"What's happened to Sarah?", Topper immediately asks. God, he's so addicted to her. Him and Rafe could compete against each other. "Nothing's happened to her", I calm him down, "She just wanted to give John B some time with his dad and she couldn't stay with Kiara. I've met her at Tanneyhill but she's not ready to stay here. I've got no home that I could offer her so it would be nice if you could take care of her for a few days", I explain to him. 

Topper's pretty predictable. Of course he nods and already worries about her. But it's fine. She needs it right now. "Of course, thanks for telling me", Topper replies, "I'm glad you told me about it. You know she'll be fine with me." "I know that's why you were the one I knew I could trust." "Hey, I'll be at the club this afternoon so if you'd want to meet up, you know where to find me, Bella." "I'd really appreciate it if we could talk at the club to-" 

"Who are you talking to?", I hear Rafe behind me. He doesn't sound amused. What does he think I'd do? Run to someone else when I'm busy getting my life together? I turn around and give Rafe an annoyed look. "Is that Rafe?", Topper asks, "He's back as well? Are you-" "No, we're not dating", I tell Topper looking at Rafe so I can answer both of the boys at the same time, "Hey, thanks for helping me. I'll meet you at the club." "I'll see you, Bella."