New Friends, New Family, New Forever

The Two Bullies: Part 2

Sarah's POV:

Joey, Rachel, & I are on the couch in her & Monica's place as Joey explains what it means to go 'Dad Hunting' with Phoebe since Chandler's not joining us this time.

Joey: "I'm telling you, Rach. Sarah & I have gone Dad hunting with Phoebe before. This is a very scary thing for her. She gets real vulnerable and..that's why we're there to...be supportive and crap."

Rachel: "Ok. Well, you just let me know when to do which."

Then, Monica walks in.

Rachel: "Hey, how'd the interview go?"

Monica: "It bit. It was a 50's theme restraunt. I have to cook in a costume and dance on the counter. I mean, I was a chef at Cafe des Artistes. I mean how could I take a job where I have to make something called Laverne and Curly Fries?"

Me: "So don't do it."

Monica: "How can I not do it? I have $127 in the bank."

Joey: "Monica, relax, go get a beer."

Monica: "I don't want a beer."

Joey: "Who said it was for you?"

I nudge Joey's arm as Chandler & Ross walk in, bearing glum looks.

Ross & Chandler: "Hi."

Rachel: "What's the matter with you?"

Chandler: "The mean guys at the coffee house took my hat."

Rachel: "No."

Joey: "You're kiddin'."

Ross: "It was ridiculous. Ya know, these guys, they were bullies, actual bullies, ya know. We're grown ups, this kinda stuff isn't supposed to happen anymore."

Ross & Rachel hug as I do the same for Chandler.

Joey: "Hey, whoa, let's go down there and get your hat back."

Chandler: "Nah, forget it, it's probably stripped and sold for parts by now."

Monica: *watching TV* "Hey, I went up."

Rachel: "What?"

Monica: "My stock, MEG, it went up 2 points. Hey guys, do you realize that if I had invested my $127 in myself yesterday that I'd like have...a lot more than that today. Ya know what, I'm gonna do it."

Joey: "Do what?"

Monica: "Put all my money in me."

Rachel: "Monica, what are you talking about? You don't know the first thing about the stock market."

Monica: "What's to know? Buy sell, high low, bears, bulls.-*over the phone*-Yes Manhattan...yeah telephone number of the stock...selling store."

{Time skip}

Joey, Rachel & I are riding in the backseat of Phoebe's grandmother's cab. When she pulls up in front of her dad's house, we're thrown forward into the pillows in their laps.

Joey: "See, didn't I tell ya these pillows would be a good idea?"

Phoebe: "Oh God, here we go. For the first time in my life I'm gonna say 'Hi birthfather'."

Rachel: "We love you."

Me: "We're here for you."

Joey: "Yeah, good luck."

Phoebe: "Thanks."

Joey turns to Rachel & me as Phoebe exits the cab.

Joey: "Hey Rach, you uh, you want some sandwich?"

Rachel: "Ohh, what is in that?"

Joey: "Olive loaf and ham spread, no mayo."

Rachel: "No no, 'cause mayo, that would make it gross."

Suddenly, a little dog starts attacking Phoebe's leg.

Phoebe: "No no no, doggie please. Oh, I do so wanna love all animals, please no. Look kibbles, bits. Oh God, alright, get the hell off my leg, you yippity piece of crap."

Phoebe flings the dog off and jumps in the cab, but he dog keeps jumping up to the window.

Phoebe: "Ok, alright, we have a problem."

Joey: "Well, why don't you just reach out and take his trampoline?"

Rachel: "Ok, here, I know what we can do."

Rachel grabs Joey's sandwich and throws it out the window.

Rachel: "Ok, doggie, go get the sandwich. Get the sandwich, doggie. Good doggie get the sandwich, get the-Ok, Joey, the dog will lick himself but he will not touch your sandwich, what does that say?"

Joey: "Well if he's not gonna eat it, I will."

Phoebe: "Are you crazy?"

Joey: "Pheebs, he's just a little dog."

Joey screams as he turns back to the car window, and the dog is halfway through it. Ok, we're gonna be here for a while again.

{Time skip}

A few minutes later, the dog hasn't done anything.

Joey: "Hey Pheebs, I think you're good to go."

Phoebe: "Yeah, I don't know."

Me: "What's the matter?"

Phoebe: "I just think that this was a really bad sign, you know. I mean, like the beast at the threshold, you know. It's just like, I have no family left, you know. I mean, except for my grandmother, you know, but let's face it, she's not gonna be around forever, despite what she says. And I have a sister who I've barely spoken to since we like shared a womb. I don't know. This is my real father and I just, I want things to be like just right."

Rachel: "Yeah, we completely understand."

Joey: "Yeah, whatever you need. Hey, you wanna go home?"

Phoebe: "Ok, thanks. Sorry, again."

Phoebe starts the cab and pulls forward, but then we hear a squish and a dog yelp.

Phoebe: "What was that?"

Joey: "Uhh, I'm guessing the threshold's clear now."

TO BE CONTINUED