Born A Weapon

take your time

April 14th 1995
(Tw:infant loss/sexual assault)

Sirius and Remus and held me back after class they had noticed a few stretch marks on my stomach and they seemed a little to out of place to be normal stretchmarks

"delphini...those stretchmarks are they..."

Sirius said eyeing my stomach and I tried to cover it but I felt the tears coming and I knew they wouldn't let me go so quickly I tried to swallow the tears away but it was a fruitless attempt and one rolled down my cheek The memories of those horrible moments came crashing down like a meteor shower Remus gently grabbed my chin and made me look in his eyes to know I wasn't lying but I kept my mouth shut I couldn't speak at all

"its okay you can tell me I'm professor moony remember I'm a friend you can trust"

And he really was because I started forming a sentence in my head to explain the last 7 years in an understandable manner

"w-well it all started on my 7th birthday it had been a day like normal my parents don't really bother with birthdays and they hadn't really remembered I think but that night when I was going to bed Lucius walked in and I expected him to ask something or tell me something but he had this weird smile and he walked closer placing his jacket on my dresser I asked him what he wanted and he said something really disturbing and stepped closer once more I didn't understand what he meant and he kept getting closer to me and eventually-"

I choked on my words and bowed my head Sirius had made his way to me and grabbed my hand urging me to go on

"it started with his hand on my arm and then my back and lower down my back over my behind and onto my thighs before I knew it I was pinned down on my bed and he...he took me right there and It hurt and I had screamed for help but no one came I screamed and squirmed but it hadn't helped and then he suddenly left and I laid there I didn't know what he had done back then and I tried to ask my mother but she wasn't even forming good sentences"

Sirius pulled me into a hug and held me there mumbling something Remus asked me if it happened again and I explained how it happened at least 3 times a week and he had stared at me mouth agape then I told them something only luna had known so far

"when I was 11 a few weeks after he had done it again I began feeling sick and I pushed it down thinking I was probably just a little sick I had just started Hogwarts and I just wanted to focus on that but then my stomach kept growing a little every day and until this point I hadn't known how babies where made but luna explained it and we got a pregnancy test from an older student and it had been positive we decided to wait to tall anyone because we didn't know what to do but in April of 1991 we where walking along the black lake when I suddenly felt blood trickle down my leg and we rushed to a bathroom where i...where I miscarried my daughter i had screamed and cried in her arms as I held my limp daughter and she calmed me down I gave her a name Delilah ophelia riddle and we buried her together in the forest somewhere where no one would run into her grave"

Sirius and Remus where so shocked they didn't talk or move at all

"it wasn't the last time it happened because when I was 13 it happened again and in the same fashion only this time I miscarried in September 2 days after starting my 3de year and like the last time she held me and my stillborn son I named Freddie Thomas riddle we buried him next to his sister and I have been completely heartbroken since I have had a theory on why they passed because both times I had been cruciod the day before by my mother for something I think it did something to my babies"

Sirius kneeled down to face me and wiped the hair out my face

"that was never your fault non of it was and I don't ever want you to think it was your such a bright happy girl and you never deserved that at all"

I burst out in tears and he held me close I had always blamed myself for what had happened thinking I had somehow led him on or that I had been a bad mother-to-be and that I had deserved all the pain and the loss of my babies his words made me feel different and for the first time in my life I felt angry furious and I wanted to strangle Lucius before I had thought it was normal and I thought he was trying to show me love or something but now I knew what he had done and I wasn't going to rest until I got my revenge and I was going to tell him about his dead children he had forced in me but for now I was a child still and getting out of that house is my first priority