Born A Weapon

going home

JULY 10TH 1994
(tw: eating disorders, mentions of alcohol and mentions of abuse and neglect)

The school year was wrapping up and that meant that me and Draco where more and more on our toes as we knew this summer wouldn't be the happy time there others were looking forward to they where all looking forward to a summer of fun and happy memories of going on vacation with their parents and playing in the warm summer heat while me and Draco where dreading another summer of hangovers after sneaking drinks to our room to drown out the pain we were experiencing and sleepless nights staying up to regret all our life choices and the things we had done

As I packed my trunk so we could leave the school that afternoon I felt the dread creep closer like a snake ready to pounce and bite me with its venom i was sitting on the floor of my dorm looking at the bare walls remembering the posters and pictures that where there previously and my stripped bed which used to contain my bedding and would be a safe haven after a hard day, I didn't have that at home because whether I was in my bed or In the living room I was still in danger no matter how well I behaved or how quiet and well behaved I was

Mother would most definitely want to weigh me as soon as I got home and I know I gained weight this last year because my eating had been getting more frequent as luna had forced me to have a better relationship with food and I had actually been eating breakfast lunch and diner for the first time in my life and I knew for certain that mother would bring my somewhat healthy weight right back down to near death as soon as she saw that I weigh 46 kilos and not the 39 she sent me to school with

So as I reluctantly stepped onto the train and sat down in my compartment next to luna I was nervous and quiet this would be 3 months where my parents had the freedom to do anything they desired to me and that thought was frankly one of the most terrifying ones

Draco was on edge as well and we all knew exactly why and as the train neared the station me and luna hugged and kissed goodbye to prevent Narcissa or Lucius seeing me and luna together and Draco and harry copied this idea

Luna and harry went to a different compartment after we extensively said goodbye

I looked at Draco's fear stricken face and I knew exactly how he felt as I was experiencing the exact same feeling my face going pale as I saw Lucius standing on the platform with his normal stern, cold expression his platinum blond hair in a low ponytail and his black suit perfectly tailored and straight, a most terrifying and condescending sight to behold

We and Draco walked out the train and to himheads bowed and faces neutral to avoid questioning and we where off back tomalfoy manor with a heavy sinking feeling in the pits of our stomach

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(Authors note)
I do not promote eating disorders and the weights mentioned are not healthy at all
If you struggle with eating or weight any of the weights mentioned seek help and stay healthy darling
You are beautiful just like you are no matter what size, color or shape you are