I feel like i've lost years i haven't lived-September

Therapy

After eating breakfast Phil quickly got ready and then they headed out to Carsons therapy appointment

It was going to be a weird time, because despite Carson going into the appointment alone she had requested that the boys be in the waiting room with Phil.

Eret's business was only a thirty minute drive away so they got there very quickly.

When they went into the office Phil told the four to sit down and wait while he checked Carson in and got paperwork. He was going to fill out the basics like insurance and then let Carson fill out the rest privately. As much as he cared for the girl he also understood that forcing her to get help or tell him whats going on with her would just make it worse. The only thing he asked was if it was okay he talked to Eret afterwards, the school had suggested they put someone with her in class to help calm her anger so Phil wanted to ask how to go about that. Phil had already told Carson this and as much as she hated it she agreed it was probably a good idea.

It only took a few minutes for Phil to put down the insurance and her birth family's medical history, or atleast what they knew of it. Once he was done he handed Carson the clipboard and moved a seat over so she wouldn't be worried about him watching as she filled it out. He had gone through similar things with his other kids, Tommy has a severe anxiety disorder that they managed to get stable with medication. Techno has auditory hallucinations that can cause him to be violent that he also takes medication and goes to therapy for and Wilbur has anger issues and a severe panic disorder.

With each of his kids he had tried to give them privacy about their mental health, of course he took care of them but he never sat by them when they were doing question sheets, he never asked the therapist what they were talking about, he never forced them to do anything they weren't comfortable with. In all aspects he tried to be the best dad he could possibly be.

However Carson was the one he was pretty clueless with. The anger issues he understood how to deal with, but none of his boys had ever been suicidal, none of his boys had ever had PTSD. He had absolutely no idea how to help Carson and that made him feel really awful.

It took Carson around fifteen minutes to finish the sheet and she handed the clipboard back to Phil. He took it up to the receptionist who quickly checked her in and said it would be around ten minutes.

The man went to sit down before he saw the boys making a mess of the children's section. He quickly walked over to the three. Tommy was actually reading the books, while Techno and Wilbur were throwing foam blocks at him, successfully agitating Tommy.

"Boys."

All three looked at Phil, Techno and Wilbur looked slightly scared while Tommy just looked upset.

"Stop tormenting Tommy. If you keep it up you'll both be grounded. Got it?"

The two nodded their heads and instead started stacking the blocks into a tower. Phil headed back towards Carson who was sitting near the door waiting for her name to be called. She was shaking her leg slightly, obviously nervous, so Phil sat down and put a hand on her shoulder. However what he meant to be comforting turned out to instead be the start of a panic attack. Carson's breathing was very sharp, similar to last night. When Phil put his hand on her shoulder she flinched heavily and almost fell out of the chair. Wilbur had started to walk over at the sight of the girl panicking but Tommy pulled him back towards the blocks, shaking his head slightly.

Phil knelt down in front of Carson, asking permission before taking her hands in his and rubbing circles in them. After a few minutes her breathing began to slow and her eyes stopped being glossed over.

The man was still rubbing circles into her hands as she calmed down. It took a few more minutes until she was fully calmed and Phil was sitting next to her lightly holding her hand. Tommy had came over and started reading some of the children's stories with Carson, which seemed to cheer her up a little bit. Wilbur and Techno were still playing with the foam blocks when Carson looked over at them.

She stared at them for a few minutes, smiling at the two laughing boys. She was glad Wilbur and Techno were so close, in fact the whole family was pretty close. Carson had betted that her family would've been close too. If her mom hadn't died, if her dad hadn't turned to drinking to cope. Phil seemed like a good dad though. Not that the girl would know, but he seemed like a good person in general. Ever since Carson had been there he had always helped her calm down and as much as Carson hated to admit it.. she trusted him.

It was about five minutes later that the door opened, revealing a tall person with brown hair. He looked to be about 6'7 or 6'8, Carson wasn't sure. But either way she was way taller then the girl had expected. Phil looked at the person and stood up, somewhat dragging Carson with him, walking over and giving a quick hug to say hello. The man reciprocated the hug and then looked at Carson. He noted that she looked scared, she was holding Phils hand and was standing behind him slightly. Eret figured it was progress that she was standing behind Phil for protection. She had read all the girl's adoption records and police reports and had guessed that Carson would have severe trust issues specifically against men.

"Hey Eret, this is Carson."

"Hi Carson, would you like to come back alone or with Phil or one of the boys?"

The girl, however, seemed to stutter her response. Earlier she had been certain about going back alone. Now though, after seeing what Eret looked like she wasn't so sure. She could hardly stand being at a table with Wilbur, would she be okay being in a closed room with Eret?

"Um. I uh- Could we.."

She looked up at Phil slightly and began speaking just to him.

"Could you go- could you go back with me?"

Phil nodded his head

"Are you sure Carson?"

Carson looked at the person standing in front of her then back at Phil and nodded her head. The three then went back into Eret's room and the session began.