i was laying alone in bed tears falling out of my eyes from when hales got up and left I heard her walk outside and I could hear popes voice and the sound of her beautiful laughter, the laughter I will no longer get to hear at one of my jokes...
all I keep thinking about was those three words that left her gorgeous mouth "its over jay" it ran through my mind again and again and again and I don't think I'll ever be able to stop thinking about it
my gorgeous sweet beautiful funny girl Haley Freeland was no longer my girl it's like square one all over again and I'm six years old fantasising about being with her..
I know Haley and I know she didn't wanna break up, the thing with Haley Freeland is she likes to hurt herself you can say self destruction is a strange thing but it's something hales always loved to do to herself and It breaks me every time cause all I want is for her to be happy but she can't let herself have a tiny bit of happiness and even if she dose let herself be happy it won't last long at all....
I love her and I always will but she dosen't love herself enough to let someone else love her
I cant even imagine what she is going through right now especially cause she thought me her bestfriend her boyfriend...ex boyfriend actually meant the worst possible thing that could ever have been said to her.
I'll never forgive myself for those words leaving my mouth and the look of her face was the moment I realised I fucked up massively...
The way she looks at me is no longer the same like before, I could tell through the sparkle in her beautiful bright blue eyes when she saw me how it would brighten her day and how much she loved me but now all I see is hatred and pain and it's killing me slowly
if I could go back in time, I'd change everything that left my mouth, I wouldn't have walked away from her and I definitely wouldn't have gone home
I should have just listened to her she is always right but I'm to much of an idiot to think that everyone is right when I'm wrong, i always have to be the one who is right and they are wrong
The other thing I kept thinking about was how I was no longer one of thoes people she loved and privileged to call her hales I was one of the people she hated and had so much disrespect to that they have to call her haley, I was the first person to call her hales and now I'm the last person she would ever want to be called that by, never in my life would I ever thought I would see the day I'd no longer get to call her hales and the way she said it was like there is never gonna be a day I will ever get to call her hales again...
it's like I'm fucking rafe cameron or topper or kelce or her mother or even any other kook who doesn't get to call her that cause she hates them so much
my heart is broken and so is hers but the only thing I keep thinking is that I broke her heart worse then she's broken mine and I can't stop beaten myself up about it
I love Haley Freeland and I never got to drop the I love you on her and she will never get to know or hear how much I love her cause she hates me
and it's all my fault...
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Very Short chapter just to get jj pov of there break up
anyways hope you liked it there will be another jj pov coming up not next chapter but the chapter after
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love you all loads (sorry for breaking them up 😭)
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jealousy || JJMAYBANK FANFIC
Romance"As I watch him laugh with her and her hand on his shoulder, there it was again the jealousy" ~ haley Freeland "As I watch her talk to Tom Pete whoever the prick is all I wanna do is beat the shit out of him, there it was again the jealousy" ~ jj m...
