Hope (Destiel High School AU)

Chapter 21 - John Winchester

*John is Sam and Deans dad if you didn't know. If you don't watch the show*

(John's POV)

My parents were raised to believe that anything but heterosexuality is wrong, and that's how they raised me as well. Ever since I was a kid, I've been completely against homosexuality. Who knew one of my sons would turn out to be bisexual? Crap, what about Sam? I hope he's not gay. This just isn't okay. Dean cannot be into guys at all. I won't allow it!

Maybe I should have raised him to be against it, too. But I guess it wouldn't have made a difference because everyone is born to be the way they are. If I had raised Dean to be against it, it wouldn't have done anything. All I've been doing since Sam was born, is practically ignore them. I don't mean to, though.

Since my wife, Mary, died, I've been moving the boys around a lot. Alcohol has been my friend, but since we came here ice been staying away from it. Drowning my problems with alcohol can't be an everyday thing anymore. I'll die at a young age from alcohol poisoning, leaving the boys to be on their own. And I can't do that. I know I'm barely around now, but I want to change that. The job I just did was the last one.

I want my sons to be able to look up to me, and to be able to count on me as their father. For almost 13 years, I've been a horrible father. Now they are going to hate me even more because I don't know if i can accept Dean being bisexual.

I go get my phone from the kitchen and look for Sam's name in the contact list. It rings three times before he picks up.

"Dad?" His voice is quiet, not whispering, just quiet.

"Hey, Sam." I say.

Sam and I never really got the chance to bond. He probably hates me for always leaving and making them move around so much. Dean isn't a huge fan of me either, especially after earlier, but he was make understanding toward me and my decisions. Probably because he's the oldest, my first skn. But earlier was something he probably isn't understanding about.

"What is it, dad?" He asks me, his voice still quiet, and I can tell doesn't want to talk to me. I bet Dean talked to him about what happened.

"Where are you?" Answering with a question because I just realized I don't know where he is.

"At my friend, Gabe's house."

Gabe? Isn't that the boy who came over that one day, when Sam came home sobbing?

"Well, can you come home?" I ask, letting go of the questions in my head. "We need to talk."

After the call, I set my phone down, then start to make some coffee. I haven't had any at all today and I need it.

Sam would be here soon, and I don't exactly know what I will be saying to him, though. But I do need to talk to him about Dean.

~

(Sam's POV)

My dad just called me, and now Anna, Gabes mom, is taking me home. This is dumb. I didn't get to hangout with Gabriel very long. My dad ruins everything. Sometimes I just hate him. He's always leaving us, and making us move around, too. It's really frustrating because all I want it to stay in one place and be a normal family. So far we are staying here but I doubt we will all three ever get along.

Dean had called me earlier, all mad at dad. Apparently Dean came out to him, and our dad didn't stop him from walking out the front door. Also, our dad was kind of mad at Dean. So obviously I can't say anything about me and Gabe, otherwise I'd get kicked out too.

-

"Dad?" I call out when I walk through our front door.

I hear "over here," from the kitchen so I walk over there. My dad is sitting at the kitchen table, drinking coffee.

"Dad." I repeat, this time not a question, and sit down across from him.

"Sam," He takes a sip of his coffee. "Thank you for coming home."

"Kind of didn't have a choice.."

"Well, still."

"What do you want dad?" I realize I sound a bit rude, but after what happened with him and Dean, I don't care.

He sets his coffee down, "I want to talk to you about, Dean."

Dean!? Oh crap this can't be good..

~

(John's POV)

I don't exactly know what how I'm going to talk to him about this. I've never been stuck with this kind of situation, so this is hard.

"What about, Dean?" He asks, looking a bit frightened.

"Well, Sam... Has Dean talked to you lately, in the past hour?"

Sam doesn't say anything to me, he just looks down at the table. This made me think he probably has. It took a moment before he replies, "yeah," and now I'm at a loss for words.

Sam and I have never been close. We've never had any talks, or hangout, or anything. I bet he hates me for that.

"So you heard about what happened between him and I?" I ask.

"Why would you do that? Why would you kick him out? Why?" He's angry now.

"Sam I-"

"No! Dean didn't do anything wrong. Do you think we just chose to be this way? No! We are born this way!"

"We?" I question. Did he just say he's like Dean as well?

"Oh um I mean like..other..people..like in general...." He looks around the room, and I know he's lying to me.

I shrug it off, "Sam. I wanted to talk to you, I want you to help me." I'll ask him about the 'lie' later.

He raises an eyebrow. "Help you? With what?" His face shows that he's confused but isn't really interested in helping.

"I want to apologize to Dean, I want him to come back home." I blurt out. Wow, that's not like me. I guess the fact that I might have lost my first born son, has scared me into that. I lost my wife in a house fire, and it tore me apart, changing my life.

Now i want to change it again. This time be sober more often, and be accepting towards Dean and his sexuality. It's going to be a hard change, but I can't lose my son. He means a lot to me, even if I've been an asshole of a father, I still care.

Dean and Sam think I just get drunk because I want to. But that's not true. I'm not good with dealing with my emotions or anything, and alcohol is just the best way to make it go away for a while.

"Are you serious!?" He says, with a hint of excitement in his tone.

"I've never been more serious." I tell him, half smiling.

-

After Sam and I's talk, Sam calls Dean and tells to come to the house. But he leaves out the part about me wanting to apologize. He will find out about that when he gets here.

I'm not exactly ready for this change since I was raised to be against homosexuality and all that, but I guess I have no choice. Dean is my son, I have to be accepting. I don't want to be that horrible parent that kicks their kid out just for coming out of the closet.

Things are going to change. I'm going to change. All so it can be better.

I hear a car park outside, and Sam looks over at me and asks, "Ready?"

"Ready enough." I reply with a grin.

Too be honest, I'm not ready at all. I can't accept Dean for who is. But I'll just have to support him all I can, and just tell him I accept it. Even if it's not completely true.

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Hope you liked this chapter :) Next one soon xx also guess what? I finally hit 1K on my SPN IG fan account. (spn.today.spn.forever) So happy. I made that account 5-ish weeks ago!
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Have a good one.
Xx