I turn, cautiously, waiting to hear the words I know are coming.
She studies me with a soft smile.
The cool air helps relax me as I sit back in my seat.
"So, Willow, how do you feel about returning to New York?" my therapist recites the question I have been practicing answering all morning.
Hooking my hands over my bent knee, I use the side of my nail to scratch at my bare legs.
A white line laying in its wake.
"I'm, I'm umm..."
Joyful?
Not quite.
Excited?
Sure.
Scared?
No.
My family is there.
"I feel good." I conclude after thinking it over for a minute.
"Just good?" my therapist questions.
Her eyes burning into my forehead.
"We can do better than that, Willow" she prompts. "How do you feel about having to see a certain someone again... Declan." She challenges.
Declan.
Somehow, seriously by the grace of god himself, I convinced my parents to not send me to rehab but I had to comprise by seeing a therapist...again.
It took a lot of back and forth arguing, many tears, and having to force myself to eat full meals in front of them but I did it.
What they didn't know is that I would throw it all back up later.
But
What they don't know what hurt them.
So here I am, just walked down the stage and was handed my diploma.
I graduated high school.
My plans for the summer?
Easy, attend the internship with Ruth McGee and hang out with the gang (minus Declan) as much as I can before we all go our own ways.
I decided on Brown.
Not my first choice, obviously.
But also, not a terrible substitute.
At least that's what I tell myself.
For a moment my family was happy.
I had put them through hell, but they found temporary peace in seeing me and Westin walk across the stage.
Now I lay on my bed, arms straight at my sides.
Eyes on the white of my ceiling.
I had won.
Today, but tomorrow would be a whole other war.
My mind feed on my lies and the lack of food that I gave it, switching up lately and giving it food had created a whole other battle.
I can hear the eager chatter downstairs as grandpa Alex, Gigi Lucy, grandma Lily, Uncle Aiden and Chad converse with mom, dad, Westin and Whitney.
YOU ARE READING
Devils and Angels (GG Reboot)
Teen FictionWillow Bass is what you would call the classic "it girl." She's got friends, money, and opportunity. Everyone wants to be her. Living the life she lives sounds easy but is it really? You'll just have to find out. XOXO Gossip Girl
