𝐻𝐸𝑅 // 𝐵𝐼𝐿𝐿𝐼𝐸 𝐸𝐼𝐿𝐼𝑆𝐻 𝐹𝐴𝑁𝐹𝐼𝐶𝑇𝐼𝑂𝑁

HER : 2

billie

okay maybe i'll admit that talking to emery isn't so very scary like i thought it would be. yes i am definitely nervous around her, i don't think i can do anything about it. but her sweet being calms me down just a bit.

i learned something new about her the other day, she moved here from a small town in oregon. said she lived there all her life before her family made the decision to pack their bags and move here not too long ago. i also found out that she has a baby brother named zaid, and she spends a lot of time with him, she said she feels like he's her responsibility. i was scared to ask her what she meant by that though.

the day after we met at her house, we had another block for bio. so we ended up updating the each other and the teacher about where we're at, then continued what we started. that day i went home and completed the intro, which led me to starting the zoomed in picture animation. it's better if i did it, the intro wasn't challenging at all and i feel bad that i'm the one that ended up with it.

i sent emery a text letting her know where i'm at, she didn't answer. i assumed she was busy working, or with her brother, cause it's his nap time, or maybe she is just ignoring me, or maybe she's doing the dishes, it's still early, no i think maybe her and meave are hanging out. yeah, she's with meave... probably.

i drew an outline based on what she had drawn for the plasma membrane and started coloring in for the background. i found it very fun to be honest, this project is such a good idea. i hate projects where i just have to make a powerpoint that meets the teachers view. if we have to get creative, isn't it also the teachers job to give us creative tasks that aren't too absurd?

"billie honey, it's dinner time." mom knocked on my door.

"coming." i sighed after saving my work and putting the ipad in the charger.

"where have you been? i've been working i've a couple songs and i wanted you to check them out, but mom told me not to bother you." finneas said as i sat on my chair.

"yeah she was in the zone." mom said.

"i have a biology project, should be done in a couple of hours though. i plan on finishing it today." i said as mom handed me my plate.

"alright i'll wait till tomorrow then." finneas nodded.

i have a lot of interests and that's what's throwing me off. i don't know what career i should pursue. i love drawing, i love science, not math, i love singing, i love designing my own clothes, i love interior designing. it's so very cool and frustrating, yes i love some hobbies more than others, but at the same time, do i really want that to be what i do for the rest of my life?

i think it's stupid that a decision i make at seventeen would effect the whole rest of my life. i'm not even a legal adult yet and you expect me to figure that out? it's fucking stupid and it's giving me hypertension and wrinkles.

"billie i was looking into colleges this morning and there was this one that had a bio engineering major that offered many incredible classes. i book marked it for you, so you could look into it yourself." dad said.

"yeah, i'll check it out when i research for colleges again." i nodded.

"you know a friend of mine said that her son just got excepted to pre medical school. don't you want to become a doctor? you love your sciences." mom mentioned.

"no, i don't think so, me a doctor? nope." i shook my head. "i really just want something that feels right, and nothing feels right at the moment and it's stressing me the fuck out."

"you'll figure it out." mom comforted.

"eventually.. i wanna time travel to that moment right now though." i said before shoving my face with delouis food.