Mental mess

Bloody history

The next day when I get to school I have an uneasy feeling in my stomach. I pulled my hood over my head and walked in to the school with my head down. I was scared to look up, cause I didn't know if I would meet James eyes when I look up. I just keep walking with my head down for the rest of the day ignoring everyone and everything. A bomb could have crashed in to the school and I wouldn't notice. I hear the final bell ring for the day and I pack up my bags and walk out, but then I feel a light tap on my shoulder and I turn around and see James standing there with the widest smile I have ver seen.

"Hi!" He say and I can see the small dimple on his cheek. I just look at him then my eyes start to wander away from him and look around the room.
"Hey..." I say quietly my eyes still not meeting his.
"What happened on the phone yesterday?" He asks both with curiosity and was it fear I heard? I start to tense up a bit trying to find a good answer.
"My phone died" I lie to him hoping my voice was convincing enough.
"Oh okay good I thought you actually had killed someone" James says and would chuckle a bit. But I don't laugh I just start to walk fast away from him, his expression turns to confusion and he starts to follow me.

I would drag him into a empty classroom and lock the door. It turn to him and I look at him sternly.
"Who is this Tony you said told you this" I say and get closer to him.
"T-the guy who called you fat yesterday" His eyes are wide and he is nearly shaking with fear.
"Of course" I say and sigh while rubbing my eyes.
"But it's not true, right?" He says not as scared as the curiosity was stronger. I don't say anything I just look down and sigh.
"You killed someone!?!" He shouts out a little to high and looks at me with a shocked expression.
"Look..." I say and sigh then look up at him.
"No, no, no, I just got the information that you killed someone was real!" He shouts at me almost a little angry.
"Well you don't know the whole story" I snap and shout back at him getting even closer.
"Then tell me!" He says and looks at me with pleading eyes.
"Why should I tell you!?" I shout at him with anger written all over my face and I move even closer, I was so close I could feel his hot breath against my skin.
"Because I'm your friend and we shouldn't have to keep secrets and I wanna know that I safe around you!" He say looking at me with pleading eyes, a baby could see how much he wanted to know what happened. I hesitate then speak up.
"It was an accident..." I say then stop and take a deep breathe.
"Me and some friends were out in the woods, we had gotten our hands on a couple of guns" I say and look up at him with a sad expression on my face.
"It was my turn to shoot at the small glass bottles... but I didn't see that my best friend was standing behind them" I stop again and swallowed, I was near tears remembering it all.
"And when I fired I missed... but just as I did he stood up and I shot him..." I say quietly and a small tear runs down my face. James I standing there in shock looking at me with wide eyes.
"I'm so sorry Hannah I should never have asked" He says quietly feeling a bit guilty that he had pushed me to talk. I would dry my tears then walk out of the classroom fast not looking back at him.