Mental mess

Police officers

I get to school late the next day with red and puffy eyes. I hadn't slept one bit last night, it had been impossible because every time I closed my eyes I say him dead in the woods. I get to my first class and sit down in my seat then I take out the notebook from my backpack. I freeze when I see the gun in my bag, I remember putting it there but I thought I took it out.

"Is there something wrong Hannah?" The teacher asks with a stern tone when he sees me going through my bag a long time.
"No not at all" I say and take out my notebook and put it on my desk.

The lesson continues but all I can think of is that gun. And what my intentions with it had been last night. But would I have the courage to do it? That I didn't know, but as soon as the class ended I was the first one out. I walked to the woods near the school and sat down on a fallen tree, I take out the gun and examine it.

Without me knowing there was someone standing not long away from me and saw everything, Tony. He was shocked to see me with a gun and was immediately scared. He ran out of the woods and to the principals office.

"Mr.Smith!" Tony said when he came running in to the principals office.
"What?" The principal says to him annoyed.
"That new girl Hannah has a gun with her! I saw her in the woods!" Tony says frantically to Mr.Smith. The principals eyes widen and he immediately picks up his phone and calls 9-1-1.

In the mean time I have put down the gun as I decide to do something before I let go. I walk back to the school yard where I see James.
"Hey.. look I'm really sorry about yesterday" He says in a kind tone and smiles at me with compassion.
"You don't have to apologize it's fine" I say and smile at him then I speak up again.
"Well I'm just happy that you called even though you heard I did that" I say and smile at him with a kind face.
"No worries..." He says but isn't really in the conversation anymore but looks at something behind me. I turn around curiously and see three police cars standing outside of the school. Two officers comes out of a car then start to walk to the school. The principal comes up to them and they talk for a while then they point at me. And I am standing there with confusion on my face. They start to walk over to me and James, and we look at each other both with confusion on our faces. But suddenly I remember the gun in my bag and I freeze and the color drains from my face.

"Hannah Baker" One of the police officer says when they come up to us.
"You are under arrest for possessing illegal weapons, everything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law" He says and puts hand cuffs on me while I just stand there completely paralyzed. James is looking at me with big eyes.
"No, that can't be right" James says with a surprised expression on his face completely shocked about what just happened. They take off my bag and soon enough they find the gun.
"I'm sorry son but it is" The officer says and holds up the gun. James doesn't say anything he just looks at me with shocked and also a sad look. I don't say anything I just look down while the officers lead me to a car. I can feel everyone's eyes on me. The school yard was no longer full of kids who are running around laughing, now everyone is looking at me...