Mental mess

Rough day

I wake up the next morning with a pounding headache and I groan. I sit up in my bed and rub my eyes. I then stand up and walk over to the mirror I looked horrible I had black bags under my eyes and my hair was messy. I sigh then open my small wardrobe and look through it, I didn't have much clothes so I just took a pair of pajamas pants with red squares on them and a white hoodie then I walk down to the kitchen and was always I count the steps.
"1...2...3...4..." And jump on to the sixth step then walk down to the kitchen this time there isn't a sandwich on the table. I look around for my brother but then hear his quiet snoring from his room and I smile slightly as I'm happy that he could find some peace so he could finally get a good nights rest. After standing there in the hallway listening to my brother sleeping calmly in his room I go in to the kitchen, my socks would stick to the floor and it would make a weird sound when I lifted my foot. I go over the the small blue fridge we had in the corner of the kitchen and start to look for something to eat. The fridge doesn't have that much food and it smells like the milks had gone bad. I sigh and would decide to skip breakfast. I looked around for my bag and found it near the stairs and picked it up, the text on it had some dirt on it but didn't care. Right as I was about to leave I get a idea I quickly go in to the kitchen take note from the fridge and write a small message to my brother.

"Morning!
I hope you slept well and I'm really sorry for last night I know I promised you but I just couldn't. I'm of to school but I hope you can take a day off so you can get some proper rest."

After I wrote the message I would lay the note on the table then run out of the house, but today I didn't run to the bus stop I walked. As I walked I could hear the small singing of birds and the small river near our house making a gushing sound, it felt so peaceful for once. I see the bus stop ahead of me and this time there is about five other kids but they all seem like they were 8 yours old. I soon close in on the bus stop and when I do they all start staring at me and I try to ignore it but the stares was like someone looked right through my soul and it sent shivers down my spine. I was great full when the bus finally pulled up in front of us and I hurried in. I looked around the bus and saw one empty seat in the back of the bus and I quickly walked over to it and sat down. But then one of the small boys sat down next to me and I shuffled a little uncomfortably in my seat, I didn't like being to close to others I guess I was kinda scared? Yeah scared was the right word, scared that I would do the same thing again. I bounce my leg up and down anxiously all the way there then when the bus stops outside the school I am quickly to get out of the bus and put on the school yard. I notice the same guys playing soccer and one of them spots me and would nudge the short boy I punched the day before. The guy would point his middle finger at me but I couldn't care less, he was a spoiled brat who got everything he wanted by just clapping his hands. I continue walking when I see James standing a little further away from we're I'm standing and I wave at him.

"Hey James, over here!" I say then start to walk up to him but when I do I see that he is hesitant but then start walking but when I see where he is walking I freeze, he is walking over to that kid I punched and he starts playing soccer with them. I turn in surprise and look at them and I swear the I saw that little devilish kid smirk at me.

The rest of the day was pretty normal but there was something was missing, James. I mean I had only known him for a day but he was so nice and genuine. I would walk in to the cafeteria and see James sitting with the soccer kids and I feel a little sad to be honest. I quickly shake of the feeling and go over to the counter with food, I look at the food then decide to go for a pizza slice and a apple. I thank the lunch lady then go to sit down by a empty table and start to eat. I'm almost done with my whole slice when I feel someone bang their fist on the table and I look up with a confused face.

"What?" I say confused with my mouth full of pizza. Then I realize who had came over to me.
"Hey you know you shouldn't be eating that right?" The boy that I punched say and chuckled slightly.
"Why?" I say and raise a eyebrow even more confused.
"Because your already as fat as a cow I don't think you need more food" He says then starts laughing and the other kids do to. I looks down at the food then start questioning things, was I really that fat? I try to shake it off but the words had clearly hurt me. I would glance over at James who is sitting with the others but he isn't laughing, why was this all so complicated. Was he mad at me or something?
"What do you gonna do now are you gonna run home to mommy and cry?" The boy says teasingly and would make is bottom lip shake and would bring up his hand to under his eye. "Buh hu" he says and would start laughing. I had enough and picked up my tray of food and pushed past him and would throw away my food quickly before running out of the cafeteria, I was pissed off but also a bit sad.

I would go in to the girls bathroom and lock one of the stalls and sit down on the toilet seat and burry my face in my hands, I was near tears but I held them back. I calm down then pull the hood up over my head and walk out. The rest of the day I keep my head down and try to not get in so much trouble, after the last lesson though I walk out to my locker and there is a note the someone slipped in through the small holes at the top of it and I look at it.

"Hey it's James can you call me after school we need to talk."

I look at the note a bit shocked but also happy. I turn the note around and there is a phone number on the back of it. I quickly pack up my stuff and head home.