Always There - Part 2 || Greta Van Fleet

Chapter 231: Marital Dreams

As I suspected, the extent of the night never ventured further than deep kisses and touches from hands that longed to hold each other's forever. Our quiet whispers of words of our futures lingered in the air, filling the room with a dreamlike wonder that I hadn't felt since we were kids; when everything felt possible, including the idea of us.

"Did you ever picture yourself getting married?" I asked, my finger gently tracing hearts across his bare chest. His hand had made its way into my hair, his fingers thoughtlessly tangling themselves within while gently massaging my head, as if now by habit. I melted within his arms, unable to remember the last time I truly felt this happy.

"Do you want the cliche answer or the real answer?" He giggled.
"The real answer." I said, now smirking up at him. He sighed, holding his stare on me for a moment.
"No." He said simply. "Growing up, I just.. could never imagine feeling so much for someone, to the point of.. wanting that. It just never seemed.. realistic. And sure, my mom and dad love each other more than anything, but.. I guess I just always felt like they got lucky to find their person, and.. maybe not everyone has a person.." His voice trailed off as his fingers gently glided down my neck, making my heart beat faster.

"But.." I said, now giggling to myself. His eyes lit up, peeking back down at me as his smile grew into a flustered grin.
"What do you mean 'but?'" He laughed. I shook my head, reaching over for his other hand, gently intertwining our fingers. He let out another deep sigh.

"But.." He finally groaned, pulling me in, kissing my forehead. "Then I.." He caught himself, laughing through the embarrassment of actually having to talk about his feelings. I pushed myself up to face him, leaning into a gentle kiss. I instantly felt his hand now caressing my face, slowly moving down to my neck, pulling me in closer as he kissed me back harder. When I finally moved away, his face had relaxed into a dazed stare, a permanent smile spread across his lips.

"There was one day.. we were having a barbecue back at the house, everyone was there but.. for some reason, that night, you.. you spent all of your time with me, which.. I thought was a little strange considering you and Josh were always attached at the hip, but.. I didn't question it because I was just.. so happy, and.. I don't know, something just changed for me that night. I suddenly started picturing my own life and.. maybe having get togethers at my house one day and.. what it would be like if we hosted.. together, and.. just.. ever since that night, I've thought about it, I've thought about you and us and now.. years later, on Thanksgiving and how we were, I just.. I wasn't scared anymore. Not when I was with you. Life is so much easier with you, Jaime. And I can't go back now, now after feeling like this. Not after knowing that this kind of love actually exists."

These were the moments I truly felt like I was in a fairytale, because when in reality do guys actually tell you about this, let alone feel like this. And I knew exactly what he meant, because I had too many nights like that with him to count, too many times I'd catch myself daydreaming about him finally on tour, me standing in the wings, admiring him the way he always deserved, finally getting to see him live out his dreams, but then always come back home to me where he belonged.

From the moment we saw each other, we've always known how we felt. And despite how many times life tried to keep us apart, we always found our way back to each other.

And I knew we always would.

"I have never been more sure of anything, than a life with you, Jaime. So.. yeah. I definitely picture myself getting married one day, but.. only under.. certain circumstances." He said softly, trying to contain his grin.
"And.. what circumstances are those?" I asked, just needing to hear him say it. He sighed, playfully rolling his eyes again.
"Only if it was to you." He said, now pulling me into a deep kiss, and then something in me was suddenly ignited, a raging fire burning through my body that craved him in a way I had never felt before, needing him with such an urgency that made me worry for the day he was no longer within arms reach, unsure of what I'd do if i couldn't have him.

I pushed him back onto the bed, carefully climbing over him, kissing him back harder as his hands slowly slid up my back, gripping me tighter, pulling me up against him. He was so warm, my hands now traveling up his bare chest, searching for the rapid beating of his heart I had grown so accustomed to; a reassuring pounding of his enthusiasm where his words often lacked.

But not tonight.

Between lustful touches and promises pouring from passionate lips long overdue, there wasn't an inch of me, inside and out, that his doting love didn't conquer, like it hadn't always been his, whether we both knew it or not.

"What about you?" He sighed, his lips now carefully grazing against my neck, teasing his intentions, knowing it was the only way to make me want him that much more.
"What about me?" I managed, leaning into another long kiss.
"Was he your only condition for getting married?" I knew what he was asking. I moved away, leaning my forehead against his. I'd hoped his desirous hunger would outweigh his curiosity for such an answer, especially at a time like this, but no such luck.

He bit down on his lip, trying to contain his grin as his eyes slowly traced my face, eventually finding their way back to meet my gaze again. Finally, I shook my head.
"No." I whispered, feeling my heart beat faster, now unable to stop thinking about that night with him and Evalyn.

Fatherhood fit him like a glove; he wore it effortlessly, like it was second nature, something I had never imagined from him, having always avoided every sense of responsibility growing up, fearing anything that could potentially tie him down, further removing him from the freedom he had always dreamt of.

I could see it so clearly. We'd make our way into their house, apologizing for our lateness because he took his time with her, carefully helping her into her dress and tiny shoes to match, understanding that this time with her meant more than any degree of punctuality.

And even when that dream had disappeared, I'd be lying if I said I didn't still imagine him as the overbearing uncle who needed to play "Dad" whenever he got the chance, though it killed me knowing that I was the reason he was demoted of such a title he so desperately deserved.

"Could it ever be me?" He finally asked. I nodded, leaning into another passionate kiss, hoping that that could be enough for tonight, because as of right now, that was all I could give him. Of course I felt this way about him, but even still, that didn't change what had happened. I still needed time, and if he truly felt the way that he insisted he did, he could understand that.

After all, what was the rush? These were the moments we had always longed for, why wouldn't you want to live within them for as long as possible. But I knew what the "honeymoon" phase with Jake felt like, I had lived it and lost it, knowing how empty I felt when it was stripped away from me.

So the question was, would we be able to survive the after. When things were no longer "shiny and new," and real life finally set in, no matter what paths the both of us decided to take. Would there be room for both of us on each other's journey? Or were we both always meant to shine alone?

These were questions for another night.

Because right now he was in front of me, telling me things I had spent a lifetime dying to hear, and I was going to let myself live within them for as long as I could before reality stripped them from me once again.

Tonight, we played pretend, completely submerged within our marital dreams, lost in worlds of forever, praying that when the sun came up, we were graced with the same love that always came alive in the night, allowing us to hide the parts of ourselves within the shadows that had always been less than kind, as to only feel the adoring embrace of a doting lover's open arms.

"Yes."