At the end of the world- A walking dead fanfic, Book 1

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After dinner Jenner brought them to the hallway where they would be spending the night. He apologized that he didn't have anything better to offer than some couches and old cots in storage. It was still a whole lot better than sleeping cramped into the RV, or sitting up in one of the cars. To make things even better they had access to a hot shower.

Kyllian stood alone in the small bathroom. This was the first time in weeks that he had a moment truly on his own. He felt everything overwhelm him all at once. The death of his brother hit him even harder than when he stood at the foot of his fresh grave. He would never get to go there to mourn again. There was nothing, not even pictures, to remember his brother.

The world spun around him and unknown voices screamed at him. He didn't understand what they were trying to tell him, he didn't know if they were even speaking. Nothing made sense anymore. He looked at himself in the mirror, but he couldn't see himself. His own face was hidden behind some type of haze that clouded his sight. His stomach turned and he barely managed to make it to the toilet before his stomach emptied itself into the bowl. Three glasses of wine on a nearly empty stomach were something he regretted now.

He sunk to the ground, all his limbs were too weak to move. He barely managed to flush the toilet before he ended up laying on the floor. He bawled up on himself, his forehead touching the cold tiles. He didn't know how long he stayed like that. He was too numb to feel the passing of time. It could have been minutes or hours when the feeling in his body returned and he began to cry.

He didn't want people to hear him and he still had to take a shower. He forced his weak limbs to cooperate and managed to stand up on wobbly legs. He felt like the smallest breeze could knock him over, but he managed to strip down and get underneath the shower. When the hot stream of water hit him he broke down completely.

Loud ragged sobs escaped his throat. He fought with his body to regain control, but that battle was already lost. His mind wandered back in time as his whole body continued to shudder with each sob. It was always the same memory: the night of the car crash, the night his mom died.

That night he was in the backseat with Levi on their way back from visiting their grandparents. Their dad hadn't come with them because work kept him back at the office for longer that day. Kyllian remembered the impact against the front of the car and pieces of glass flying through the air as the car flipped upside down. When the car impacted on the ground it was upside down, the roof was now the floor. He couldn't get his mom or Levi to reply to him and he was too young to understand why neither of them could reply and panicked. He remembered seeing them bleeding, his mom more than Levi. Kyllian undid his own seatbelt and fell on his head hard, but somehow didn't break his neck. He crawled out of the car through the broken window beside him. Pieces of glass pierced his hands and knees.

Dazed, scared and confused, he scrambled to his feet. Other cars had stopped. There were other people there, some talking and some screaming. Kyllian didn't know they were reacting to the pile up their vehicle was a part of. The small boy wandered forward further, covered in glass and bloodied. Someone walked forward and draped his jacket over his shivering shoulders and guided him back to his car to wait for an ambulance.

Kyllian finally managed to shrug that memory off and sunk down to the ground as hot jets of water continued to rain down on him. He felt numb. It was better than the all consuming despair that had just wrecked his body. He already missed his brother more than he dared to admit. He reminded himself that Jenner had urged them to use the hot water sparsely, so he hurried up and finished up quickly. He couldn't stay locked in here for longer, people would notice and get concerned.